


and when the morning finds the sun

by zappactionsdower



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, M/M, general au of au'ness, hi i found him can i keep him please
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-14
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-15 04:14:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 20,654
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29430114
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zappactionsdower/pseuds/zappactionsdower
Summary: 'I'm here to kill you.  Nothing else."  Felix warned.The king tilted his head.  “And if you lose?”Felix scoffed.  “Then I die.”“If I lose, I accept.  You may plunge your weapon into my heart.  But if I win,” the king slowly shed his outer cloak to reveal a slender form clad in black fabric, “you will agree to be my mate and bear my children.  Is that acceptable?”As if he’d ever bear the pups of - of anyone else.  As if another Alpha would ever stir his instincts again.  “You can try.”(Felix was making it as a mercenary.  But his assignment to take out the mysterious Winter King quickly becomes complicated.)
Relationships: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/Felix Hugo Fraldarius, Minor Sylvain/Ingrid - Relationship
Comments: 66
Kudos: 143
Collections: 2021 Dimilix Week





	1. nautical dawn

It was raining.

Felix sighed, dramatically slumping against his window as he made another round of agitated sniffles. He’d spent all his time cooped up inside while everyone else came and went in a hustle of activity. _Too young_ , Glenn mocked quietly, _still a whelp and a brat_.

Felix wasn’t that young. He was a teenager and a Fraldarius, and that meant he’d grow into a strong Alpha just like his brother and father. He’d learn to fight and he’d learn to protect the border, just as they had. 

But right now he was stuck indoors, surrounded by foolish adults who coddled him and treated him as some adorable child instead of the future fighter he would be.

At least when it was warm and sunny he could fight outside. At least - 

Felix perked his head up and squinted.

A shadow darted between the bushes. 

He briefly considered telling the maid but she’d only pat his head and claim a nightmare. And that only left Felix himself to guard the house.

He darted down the steps and slipped quietly through the edge of the kitchen. A few men were chatting quietly about the northern kingdom over alcohol - political things that Felix had no interest in.

He dug through a small hidden alcove where he always tucked his sword. The maid had a terrible habit of trying to take it for fear of Felix harming himself. That was utterly ridiculous - a Fraldarius used a sword the same way a hawk used its claws.

Outside, the rain pelted everything in thick, cold-spring drops. The world was cast in greys and ugly browns and Felix could hardly see in the dim morning light.

The shadow had been on the side of their estate - right near the lily-garden. Felix clutched tighter and tighter to his sword as he pressed forward. His hair clung to his face and he cursed and - 

He stumbled and collided with the wet ground.

Felix flailed with his sword drawn and stopped when he noticed the lump his foot was still tangled up wth. It was - it was a person. At least it looked like a person - it was the right shape but the clothes were so wet and the face and hair so covered in mud that it was impossible to say for sure.

The body twitched. Once. Twice. 

Felix dropped his sword.

Nobody ever went into the small chapel at the side of the estate. Felix’s mother - when she was alive at least - would make a point to always stop by and speak to the goddess at the small altar tucked in the corner. After she died, Felix’s father decorated it with new flowers on the outside and very little on the inside and told his sons that they were always welcome to practice the Seiros faith if they wanted to.

Felix always thought the place a little too private, a little too silent. No matter how loud you were, somehow the chapel swallowed all noise.

It made a perfect place to hide though, especially for some stranger that was still shivering even after Felix had wrapped three blankets around them.

The stranger’s moppish hair hung limply around her head in thick muddy clumps. Their clothes might have been nice once - but Felix was going to tear them off and burn them as soon as an opportunity presented itself. It seemed a little too rude to do so at the moment.

Instead he’d snuck out a huge block of cheese and some relatively fresh bread and set them near the stranger. 

“Go on. Eat it.” Felix commanded, trying to use his father’s most stern Alpha voice.

Slowly, skittishly, the stranger grabbed the cheese block. And then without any grace, they devoured it in huge, frantic gulps.

The stranger was a girl, Felix finally decided. That explained the hair and the… ruffly clothes. Maybe she’d run away from her home because she’d already presented as an Omega - Felix heard plenty of stories of young Omegas who upon presenting were immediately engaged to some well-to-do Alpha. Felix didn’t understand it but he didn’t have to either.

“What’s your name?” Felix finally asked as the girl gobbled through the entire bread loaf. 

She looked up, startled. Her throat worked as she set the loaf down and waited a moment. “Alex. It’s Alex.”

“That’s a weird name for a girl.”

That didn’t seem to be right, judging by the way that her lips turned downwards. Felix awkwardly looked away at the small row of candles he’d lit safely against the brick wall.

“I’m a boy.” Alex mumbled, huddling tighter into he - _his_ blanket. “I apologize for the confusion.”

“Oh.” Felix awkwardly puffed a breath of air. “Sorry. It’s the ruffles.” This was going absolutely nowhere. “Why are you on our estate anyway? Are you running away?” 

“I - it is nothing.” Alex breathed. “Thank you for the meal.”

He was hiding something, that much was certain. But Alex didn’t look the least bit dangerous - he was small and slender and muddy and lacked any table manners. Thieves, Felix knew from Glenn’s stories and the mutters at the marketplace, were large, imposing individuals and didn’t waste their time with mud and rainstorms.

“Where are you going then?” 

“I don’t know. I don’t have anywhere else _to_ go.” Alex’s voice wavered.

Felix looked at him and all the blankets and the sorry way his hair drooped.

“I have an idea.”

Rodrigue Achille Fraldarius returned to his estate just in time to witness utter chaos. His head manager, Daisy Odess, was in a shouting match with his youngest son Felix. Behind Felix stood another young, unfamiliar boy with bright blonde hair and wearing Felix’s clothes.

“The young master _expects_ me to believe that he’s gotten a servant out of thin air.” Daisy crossed her arms and glowered with all the force of a bull. Daisy was an Alpha and one that managed, somehow, to contain the messiness of two stubborn boys and an estate that soldiers regularly came and went through on their way between Leicester and the collapsing Faerghus Dukedom. “I have not vouched for this - this vagabond and I will not have strangers beneath my roof.”

Felix’s face was as red as an Indech apple and his eyes were watering in a way that promised a waterfall if he was pushed any more. “His _name_ is Alex and he’s _mine_. I brought him here. I told him he could work for us. And you can take y - “

Rodrigue raised his hand. Both Felix and Daisy stepped back and looked away.

Goddess. Rodrigue needed to be around more. “You… found a boy.”

Felix glanced at his shoes and tucked his body in front of the other boy. He really was a small thing with golden hair and blue eyes and - 

Oh.

Rodrigue’s chest tightened as he noticed the way Alex stared at him. Slowly Rodrigue stepped forward and knelt down to place his hands on the two boy’s shoulders. “And where did you find this boy?”

“I found him in the marketplace. When I went for a new sword.” Felix lied.

“You haven’t left the estate in four days.” Daisy warned as she shook her finger. “I will not allow liars in this house.”

“And where is your family - Alex, isn’t it?” Rodrigue asked.

“I do not know.” Alex met his gaze but his eyes were decidedly sad. “I’m an orphan.” And then, for good measure, he half-bowed. “Sir.”

Rodrigue knew that movement all too well. “Is that so?”

Alex kept his head bowed and nodded.

“ _Your father was a good man._ ” Rodrigue spoke quietly in the old tongue.

Alex went ghost-white.

“Well.” Rodrigue stood up and crossed his arms. “Regardless, I have no issues with hiring on another person to keep the estate running. I do not have a lot of funds for payment - taxation and all - but you are welcome to your own bedroom, whatever food we have, and clothes as needed. More importantly - if this is your new servant, he is also your responsibility Felix. And I do believe you’re at the right age to take advantage of some new responsibilities.”

Felix’s eyes widened just as Daisy’s lips twisted upwards in realization.

“The young master does indeed need to learn some lessons.” She crossed her arms. “As the saying goes - an unhappy servant is a blight upon the family’s name.”

Felix huffed, his eyes getting watery all over again. “Whatever. We’re going to the market.” He grabbed onto Alex’s wrist and yanked.

Rodrigue watched them leave and let out a shuddering breath.

He had a few letters to write.

Alex proved to be a terrible cleaner. Daisy quickly realized the boy had never cleaned a dish in his life nor sewn a single tear in clothing. Even worse, Alex had the uncanny ability to crush the finest china plates just by _holding_ them. She never met a single person who bent needles in half but to Alex, the little pieces of metal may as well have been twigs.

But he was always willing to assist and Daisy found him perfectly happy to carry whatever boxes or bags she needed moved around. He once dragged an entire casket of wine down to the cellar by himself, something the rest of the household refused to believe until he did it a second time.

The biggest change was with the youngest Fraldarius who took it upon himself to train Alex and drag him all through the estate at any moment that Alex was not doing chores. Felix took Alex to the market or into the stableyards and Alex even sat patiently with Felix during the long hours of education under Felix’s personal tutor.

With Glenn gone to seek his fortunes in the Leicester navy, it made sense that the young master was lonely and needed a playmate. Instead of catching the young master picking fights with random strangers at the marketplace he ran around with blunt weapon drawn, constantly baiting Alex into quick bouts or games of hide and seek.

Three months in and the estate was, despite the occasional destruction of doors or shattered china, far more lively and pleasant.

Felix, however, would have very little fortune to inhabit if his servant kept breaking all the kitchen finery.

Felix only had vague memories of his mother. She’d been pretty, it was said - a perfectly elegant Omega with the gift of a clever tongue and a love of Adrestian opera. His father met her in Faerghus, before the civil war and the kingdom collapsed. Rodrigue never talked about why they’d left the kingdom and Felix hadn’t minded - living in a bleak, snowy country without the warmth of spring and summer seemed absolutely miserable.

Occasionally, he dreamed of her though. Felix didn’t ever remember the full details - merely that she’d drifted through like a ghost in her blue-rose nightgown. Her cold hands brushed along his forehead and she hummed in an echoed voice, soft and soothing and yet - 

He glowered at his empty wall and breathed. Without Glenn around his room was far too big, even if he was assured over and over again that he’d grow into it over time and once he presented.

Felix scuffled through the upstairs and down to the servant’s quarters. Most of the household staff lived in town but a few, including Daisy and a weathered guard named Narcis, had their own rooms and private studies to use as they so desired.

Alex’s room was at the very end of the estate near the chapel. It was small and uncluttered, with only a few flowers tucked carefully into vases for decoration.

Without knocking, Felix shoved the door open and stepped inside. “Are you awake?”

Alex was very still.

Felix rolled his eyes and impulsively stepped forward. The blonde had his blankets halfway down and Alex himself was asleep on his stomach, very still and - 

Felix reached forward.

In a flash Alex _moved_ , grabbing onto Felix and yanking him onto the bed. Felix squawked, startled, and saw a dull flash of something metal in the dim light.

Alex had a knife to his throat. Slowly, Alex dropped the weapon and sat up. “Felix?”

Felix felt oddly small and confused. He scrabbled upwards, anxiously leaning against the headboard as he glowered at his servant. “What the _fuck_?”

“Why are you here?”

“Why the fu - what - are you trying to kill me?!” Felix hissed sharply. “Who sleeps with a _knife_?”

“Why are you here?” Alex repeated. “Is there something wrong in your room?” He leaned forward, his hand coming up to check Felix’s forehead. “Are you running a fever?”

Felix flushed. Something about Alex touching him felt - it felt weird. Granted he’d been the one to enter the bedroom but still. 

“Whatever.” Felix flopped down onto the mattress, completely done with - whatever was going on. His heart kept beating in his chest and he couldn’t stop thinking about why Alex would need a knife, or where he got it, or whatever else was going on with him. 

“You’re sleeping in my bed?” Alex sounded genuinely perplexed.

Felix shrugged the blankets over his head and glared at the wall.

Slowly, Felix felt the mattress move. Alex’s bed was not nearly as big as Felix’s but it was built for a grown man to sprawl out on so two young teenagers could fit comfortably. Probably. And if not, well, it was Alex’s stupid fault for holding a _knife_ like some vagrant.

They didn’t have a lot of space between them. So be it - Alex deserved some awkwardness. The warmth of Alex’s body soaked through the blankets into Felix’s very bones and Felix started to forget about missing mothers and sharp objects.

“I never did thank you.” Alex murmured quietly, his breath puffing against the back of Felix’s head.

“For what?”

“Saving me.”

“That’s what Alphas do. The _noble_ ones at least.” Felix grumbled, somehow hotter than he was supposed to be.

“You’re an Alpha?”

“I’m going to be.” Fraldarius men were always Alphas - it was why their family lineage was full of knights and warriors. 

“Oh.” Alex just sounded thoughtful. “What if you don’t?”

Felix’s eyes opened sharply. “What?”

“If you present as a Beta. Or an Omega?”

Felix scoffed. “Don’t be ridiculous.”

“Apologies.” Alex’s voice drifted off, as though he was thinking to himself. “I suppose it does not matter, does it?”

It was outright unimaginable - the life of an Omega. The ones in Leicester were always petite things on the arms of well-dressed Alphas and it was even common practice to _capture_ them in some weird run after a night of feasting and celebrating with wine and arranged meeting spots between families. Felix didn’t even care about that -Glenn was already going to carry on the family line so Felix could spend his life fighting. Maybe he’d protect the sea from pirates - maybe he’d teach the sword. It didn’t matter too much at the moment.

He listened to Alex’s breathing and soon, despite himself, fell into a sound sleep.

Felix found he much preferred the body heat of another to sleeping alone in his too-big bed.

  
  


The year passed without too much fuss although Felix noticed there were far more soldiers coming and going in the marketplace. A few merchants whispered quietly about something happening to the south, close to the Adrestian border.

Felix was certain the adults could handle it. He had a new swordmaster at the estate and Alex was all too willing to watch and maintain the weapons between bouts. In the past year the blonde kept _growing_ , taller and taller and more and more slender. Felix didn’t mind - they were keeping pace and besides, he was certain to be as tall and imposing as Glenn once he finally reached adulthood.

At night they’d share a bed, Alex often stiff and guarded from growing pains. By the summer moons, Felix started to feel unfamiliar pains as well, a sign that he’d soon be presenting 

In retrospect, maybe that was when he should have known.

The trouble started on a Sunday. Felix felt particularly sore and warm and Alex carried himself with a noticeable stiltedness. Sunday was when he and Alex would descend down into town proper to peruse the weapon stall and visit the tailor for whatever adjustments needed to be made to their clothes. Already, Felix felt too tight; caged by fabrics and something undefined.

Alex was distracted. Felix learned that he’d get a blank look on his face whenever he was thinking about something somewhere else and he’d start tilting his head rightwards.

“Glenn’s coming back in a week.” Felix announced, mostly to draw Alex’s attention back to himself. A distracted Alex, Felix learned, did foolish things like pick up the wrong soaps or brea Daisy’s shipments before they returned to the estate.

“Oh. I look forward to finally meeting him.” Alex replied in a way that was a little too nice and a little too distant. They both wove through the bustling mess of people and cacophonous noise of street vendors. 

Felix bristled.

“He still hasn’t found a mate.”

“I believe you mentioned he did no - “ Alex stopped.

Alex went as still as a statue, his blue eyes wide. Felix turned his head, trying to make out what caught Alex’s attention in the crowded square.

Another teenager, a little older than them, dark-skinned and pale-haired, stared back.

And then he disappeared.

Felix turned back and his insides twisted at the unfamiliar expression on Alex’s face. An expression he’d never seen before.

He didn’t like it.

“Come on.” Felix demanded as he grabbed onto Alex’s forearm. Alex followed, but his gaze kept going back to that stranger.

That night, Alex stood at the window instead of setting into the bed. It was just as well - they were both getting too big for it to be comfortable and Felix was certain his father would demand they separate again. 

“Who was that?” Felix finally asked.

“Who was who?”

“The boy.” Felix kept his breathing quiet as the ache came back. “You knew him.”

“A ghost. I think.” Alex was quiet; barely audible as his hand pressed against his window. “Do you think Adrestia is planning something?”

“What do you mean?” Adrestia did take over Faerghus in some messy coup that his father didn’t talk about. They’d fled, back when Felix was a tiny thing with no memories to speak of, and somehow his father made a deal with the Leicester government for protection in return for guarding the border from any northern soldiers.

Adrestia wouldn’t attack Leicester. Not with Almyra so close and so ready to take any conflict as a sign to shred them both. His swordmaster spoke of a massive fleet of ships and waves upon waves of skilled warriors and beastly horses.

“Apologies. I am your servant, first and foremost.” Alex drifted back to the bed and Felix felt another burst of unpleasant warmth. He only related as Alex’s arm wrapped around him and the blonde buried his nose against Felix’s neck.

That was new and kind of weird but not the worst thing ever. Maybe it meant Alex would be an Omega. Either way, Felix was certain he could take Alex with him. He was pretty good with a sword although Felix caught him every once in a while just toying around with a broom as he swept the kitchen.

“You don’t have to _just_ be a servant you know. When we - when I come of age, we can go wherever. We can do whatever.” Felix mumbled against the pillow. “I won’t make you wash another dish ever again.”

He could almost feel the smile against the back of his throat.

“Good night, Felix.”

Three days later Alex disappeared from his duties, citing a desire to purchase a gift for Glenn’s return. Felix stormed through the estate and finally spent his day viciously brushing down his horse and then cleaning his favorite sword. Alex usually adored the horses and would spend hours feeding their stallions apple slices and making their coats gleam.

Felix hurt. His stomach kept cramping up and his joints tingled. Something felt like it was about to happen and somehow, somehow, it made him wary.

He didn’t see Alex until very late in the afternoon, and only through the cracked door of his father’s private study.

They were talking and Alex’s body language was all wrong. He couldn’t make out their words because they were speaking in an entirely different language.

A language Felix didn’t recognize.

“You went and saw him again, didn’t you?” Felix muttered as Alex nuzzled into his neck.

“You smell different.” Alex mused.

Felix flopped over, anxious. “Do you like him better than me?”

Alex’s brows furrowed together in confusion. “I’m sorry?” He withdrew, sitting up on the edge of the frame. “Felix, what’s wrong?”

“You’re hiding something. “ Agitated, aching, Felix stood up and tugged his shirt tighter to try and hide the sweat forming near his throat. “I’m going to bed. My _own_ bed.”

He slammed the door behind him.

The next day Felix felt as though he was coming apart at the seams. A few of the early-morning staff gave him odd looks as Felix grabbed his sword and went to his small training yard. His body felt too hot; too anxious. Alex stayed away, more so due to the additional chores that needed to be performed with so many visitors coming to the estate in just a few days.

The blonde finally arrived around noon when the sun hung high over the sky and Felix soaked his clothes with sweat and frustration.

“What do you want?” Felix’s arms ached. Goddess - Glenn never said presenting would feel like _this_. “Are you going to leave again?”

Alex’s lips pursed together. “I would return, if you would wait for me.”

Felix scoffed. For some reason, he felt - he felt like fighting was the only answer. “You’re a liar.”

Alex stepped forward. Felix gripped his sword but his hand was shaky as Alex’s fingers curled around his grip. Alex’s other hand went to Felix’s chin, his pinky touching Felix’s unsteady pulse.

“Why are you so angry?” Alex tilted his head, curious.

“Don’t be ridiculous.” Something was happening here. Something important. Felix’s head spun, brief. Clearly he’d been in the sun for far too long. “You’re my servant. You should serve _me_ , not fixate on some stranger in a - “ He flushed. “Whatever it is, it’s pointless.”

“Pointless?” Alex’s frown grew more pronounced, almost - sad. Why should he be sad? “Felix, are you jealous?”

“What?!“ Felix flailed in frustration. “That’s - you’re - ridiculous! You’re - !”

Alex leaned close and kissed him.

Felix shivered, both with sudden realization and something deeper. Something stronger. He dropped his sword and leaned in, chasing the taste, his whole body electrified. This was good. This was _right_. He felt - he felt - 

“Felix?” Alex’s voice grew breathy and soft, _hungry_ and Felix -

He felt something wet between his thighs.

“Felix?”

Felix felt - he felt empty. He felt hot. He felt - 

“Felix, hold on.” He was being lifted up and that was - that was good. They needed to nest. They needed to _mate_. “Stay with me. I’m taking you to the physician.” Physician? That was ridiculous. Alex needed to take him somewhere safe and lay his claim. Wasn’t that - 

Felix’s mind dissolved into a fugue.

Felix didn’t remember the next three days. Not clearly. He cried and cried for Alex but instead he was assaulted with the smell of aloe and mints and unfamiliar hands upon his forehead. He was too hot; he was too empty; he was _alone_ in a way he was not supposed to be.

When he finally came back to his senses it was to Glenn looking down at him with a distant, guarded expression.

“Hey brat.” Glenn swept his hand through his hair and then flopped down into a chair. “How are you feeling?”

Felix blinked his dry eyes out and buried his head into a clean linen pillow. The maids had bustled in throughout to replace the sheets and each time Felix had seethed about how unpleasant they felt against his oversensitive skin. “What the fuck.”

“You’re an Omega.” Glenn patted his hand awkwardly. “Always figured you’d buck the family sooner or later.”

Felix felt a deep twisting knife of shame and horror. “What?” That was impossible. No way - no way was he - “Where’s Alex?”

Glenn looked out the window, his voice low and tired.. “He’s gone. Disappeared two nights ago.”

No. No no no no no. “Why? Where the fuck - “ Felix sat up, or tried to. His bones still hurt terribly. “Why did father - “

“Dad’s gone too.” Glenn sucked in an uneasy breath. “He was summoned to Derdriu. Adrestia’s just invaded.”


	2. red sky at morning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What have I done

“This is disgusting.” Leonie complained, her voice almost drowned out by the evening squall.

Beside her, Felix grunted beneath his soaked hood. It wasn’t the worst assignment they’d ever received but it was still absolutely miserable.

“Are you sure you don’t want to live as some Alpha’s arm candy?” Leonie added as she tried to navigate between the trees and obstacles leading towards their destination.

Felix didn’t bother to reply. Leonie was a Beta, and one from a poor village on the outskirts of Leicester proper. Anything she’d had over the years, she’d gained from hard work and harder decisions. If anyone deserved a life of cloistered leisure, it was Leonie.

Still, Felix cringed as his boots squelched in the deep mud all the same.

This particular mission wasn’t the most dangerous they’d ever had. Bandits were common in “New Leicester” as the Empire called it as most of the local law enforcement existed only to funnel taxes back to Adrestia and did little to manage anything not immediately related to profit. 

That left the few mercenary groups with too much pride to bow to Adrestian coin to deal with all the bandits and beasts that roamed the wilderness unhindered.

Their job this time was to investigate some local bandits responsible for a recent raid of one of the old churches near the border with North Adrestia (another pretty and completely meaningless name, in Felix’s not so modest opinion). 

The townsfolk they’d talked to had very little idea of who would bother with the place but they were affronted all the same. The church itself was empty and hollow, the only thing still standing was an old statue of Sothis at the center. Someone placed a few blue flowers in front of it - not a bandit and for some reason that rankled Felix.

He had more important things to fixate on. Leonie noticed several bootprints leading out the door and towards the edges of a forest and they’d been off.

She’d spent her entire life hunting wildlife. A few clumsy bandits were nothing compared to more clever creatures like foxes and rabbits.

But rainy weather had a terrible habit of erasing footsteps and that meant they needed to hurry. Felix followed Leonie as they came closer and closer towards what looked to be an old, abandoned outpost.

Leonie pulled her hood up tighter and crept towards their destination. There were signs of life - freshly-broken twigs, a few fabrics flopped sadly against the side of a nearly-crumbled wall.

A fresh skull of some poor animal hung out as a warning.

Felix gripped his sword. “How many do you think?”

“Hard to say.” Leonie gripped her own weapon - a small set of throwing knives. “There were at least three sets of footsteps but that doesn’t mean they were the only ones there.”

Bandits liked to cluster, at least as long as there were things to raid. Felix wrinkled his nose in disgust.

“We’re at a disadvantage now so we can wait and observe for a little bit.” Leonie reasoned quietly.

Felix shook his head and his hair flopped against his temples. “The rain’s favoring us.”

“Favoring  _ you _ , you mean.” She rolled her eyes. “Fine. Go on in and I’ll cover. Be careful though.”

Felix nodded. He inched along the side of the wall, trying to gauge what he was dealing with. In ten years, the outer areas of Leicester fell into disrepair and the outposts and small towns took the worst hit. 

It could have been worse - much worse, if the ruling council hadn’t already bowed their heads and welcomed Adrestia with open wallets. To their credit, they were more willing to become weak puppets to a corrupt count who spent his time collecting Omegas rather than risk what happened to Faerghus.

Not that it helped people like Leonie either way.

Felix forced his thoughts back to his surroundings. The outpost was still in relatively good condition, all things considered, with most of the roof intact. It was too small to provide many hiding spots yet - 

Felix stopped.

There was a corpse lying on the ground. The man - whoever he was - wore a dark brown scarf; the symbol of one that chose to thumb their nose at the law. 

A bandit then.

Slowly Felix moved forward, holding tightly to his sword. Most bandits operated with fear over skill but they weren’t exactly weaklings. For one of them to be killed here meant either the group had a falling out or something much worse than a bandit was skulking around.

He spun just in time to get his answer. Felix raised his sword up as someone slammed a thick spear downwards near his shoulder. He jumped back, dodging another swipe as his attacker swung his weapon in a wide, quick arc.

He couldn’t make out much. The stranger - whoever they were, wore a porcelain-grey leonine mask and black over black. He had a bag at his hip, heavy with the weight of some sort of treasure.

Felix traded blows, his heart thundering at the close quarters. Against axes, against fists, he had every advantage. But the stranger knew exactly how to push Felix backwards and get him off balance.

The figure swung his spear and Felix’s sword twisted at an odd angle.

And then he stopped, just for a moment.

Felix snarled and swung his free fist. His attacker dodged and spun them both towards the exit and then he disengaged, turning around to run away.

Felix’s blood pumped harder, his body already moving to chase the stranger. Nobody looking like that could be good news and more importantly, Felix had to - 

“Felix!”

Felix’s feet slid in the mud and he barely managed to avoid colliding with a particularly sad-looking tree.

Leonie ran up to him, her knives at the ready. 

“Did one of them get away?” She yanked her hood back and looked around.

Felix blinked. The figure was long gone.

Right. The mission.

“I don’t know.” He put his sword back into its sheath and stood as straight as he could. “But I don’t think we have to worry about those bandits anymore.”

Most days, Felix tried not to think about his past. Some days, he even pretended his life at the family estate was all a dream - a fantasy he made up himself with warm baths and fussy servants and stability and a father that wasn’t locked away in the bottom of a tower in Derdriu for disloyalty and a brother that wasn’t politicking with nobles he hated so his younger brother didn’t have to be used as marriage forder.

More often than not, he told himself Alex was merely a figment of his imagination brought on by his Omega instincts. A fever-dream he used to keep himself from feeling alone - a perfect mate that never existed.

Sitting in an ice-cold bath, trying to get all the mud out from his hair, his mind drifted back towards that fantasy. Alex would have grown up too, probably tall and still moppish and clumsy. Perhaps he’d be a Beta - he was too easygoing for a dominant Alpha. He’d be thin and polite, his hair perhaps now a light, dusty brown, darkened with age.

Felix felt warm - warmer than he had in quite a while. For once, he let his hands drift lower in the frigid water and stroked himself a few times. His fingers itched to bury themselves inside, provide some relief to a tension he hadn’t felt in ages.

Felix let out a frustrated groan and buried his head beneath the cold, soapy water.

He was too old and bitter for fantasies.

They didn’t even need to trek back to their headquarters. The next morning, as Felix descended the stairs of the small inn he and Leonie resided in, he was greeted by a familiar sight.

“Morning.” Judith, the leader of the Daphnel Mercenary Group, waited with a modest breakfast and a stein full of ale. Leonie sat to her left, sharpening her knives. To Judith’s right were two strangers - one with dark skin and wearing a complicated gold scarf and the second a pale young woman in greens and blues.

Felix knew he was headed for trouble.

“Why are you here?” For her to come so far north meant whatever was happening was a priority. And priorities were more exposure than Felix liked. Bandits were simple.  _ Priorities  _ were walking into a wolf’s den with a freshly skinned rabbit at your hip.

“I had some business to attend to so I thought I’d drop by and check on you kids.” Judith glanced knowingly towards her right. “This is Claude, a troublesome brat from Derdriu and my very, very distant niece, Ingrid.” The woman’s lips twisted downwards.

“So you’re the legendary Contrarian Omega.” Claude smiled and Felix didn’t see a spark of humor in his eyes. “I was expecting someone more - delicate.”

Felix bit his tongue as he sat down at the table. Judith didn’t like it one bit when one of hers insulted potential clients. Claude radiated smug Alpha in a way that Felix always felt an impulsive urge to fight with. 

“They say you’ll only mate with someone who can defeat you in combat.” Claude leaned forward to rest his hand on his chin. “Seems a little excessive, don’t you think?”

“And so far no one has.” Glenn spent all his time making up more and more ridiculous stories about why Felix was unmated. He wa still a Fraldarius after all, and even with a father in disrepute, the Fraldarius sons were considered highly valuable due to Glenn’s capability in the Adrestian military social circles and natural charisma and Felix’s - 

Felix’s  _ status _ .

“Some also say you’ve slept your way through every one of the Leicester nobility one by one.” Claude tilted his head thoughtfully.

Goddess, Felix would kick Glenn’s teeth in next time he saw him. 

“You’ll not find a better swordsman in the whole of Fodlan. Or a more social one.” Judith took a long sip of her ale and behind the stein, her gaze was downright calculating. “Leonie’s my best tracker. These two can get the job done.”

“Depends on what it is.” Felix looked to Leonie who kept her eyes fixed on the knives in her hand. Leonie didn’t have the luxury of turning down work when it was presented to her.

Still. Felix considered it his own job to keep her out of danger whenever possible.

“Well, my lovely friend,” Beside Claude, Ingrid was looking even more dour, “How much do you know about Faerghus?”

He really was cocky all right. You didn’t utter that name unless you  _ wanted  _ to be interrogated by an Imperial soldier.

“If this is about my family histo - “

“There are a lot of rumors now about something happening up north.” Claude interrupted as smooth as butter. “Not that any of the Adrestian government wants to admit it. Bad for morale and all. But Ingrid here can fill you in on that.”

Ingrid sat straighter but her eyes fixed squarely on Felix. She didn’t look like a servant or a mercenary - her clothes weren’t plain but it was hardly the formal wear one would find in a noble in Adrestia. A Beta, perhaps, and an assistant to Claude? He didn’t care to know. 

“There’s a saying in - in my home. That no matter how high the snow falls, there are still seeds buried beneath. The Winter King will return, just as the tree will always grow when spring arrives.” Ingrid kept her gaze steady even as her voice hardened.

“I don’t care about fairy tales.” Felix crossed his arms.

Ingrid just glowered. “You don’t care about anything, do you?”

Felix felt his mouth opening when Claude waved his hand dismissively. “The point being - there’s some group wiping out whole battalions of Adrestian soldiers, seemingly overnight. The leader of the Dukedom - whatever her name is - isn’t talking and instead claims that it’s just some mass defections and some kind of stomach bug.” Claude’s smile was back, even as his voice dropped to a low, cool timbre. “But I’ve heard stories of someone calling himself the Winter King getting into all sorts of mischief. Not that anyone will really swear to it. You know the Adrestian Empire - so afraid of showing weakness until they’re ready to take on Almyra.”

Felix’s gut twisted as he looked at Leonie. “You’re not seriously going to ask us to chase ghosts.”

“I assure you, I can make it worth your while. Find the Winter King and do what you do best.” Claude paused to reach under the table. He withdrew a small velvet-black pouch and tossed it onto the table. Several bright, brilliant coins spilled out. “Consider this a down payment.”

Leonie went very still, her eyes wide. Felix couldn’t blame her - that much coin could cover her entire town for a whole year.

Judith took another sip of her drink.

“And if we end up chasing ghosts - “ Claude shrugged, “Then I wasted my time and I’m going to be in serious debt. Gotta play big to win big, right?”

Felix liked to pretend he had morals. That he could refuse whatever jobs came his way. Judith herself had more than enough mercenaries at her beck and call; enough and in so many different roles that Felix doubted anyone but her knew the extent of it. 

His life over the past several years taught him to appreciate the value of coin. That no matter how much he wanted to claim some kind of moral high ground, he wasn’t guaranteed a warm bed or a meal. That the only way, besides dirtying his hands to get it, was to submit to some Alpha and live his life trapped in a gilded cage.

That people like Leonie didn’t even get that choice.

“I’ll do whatever Leonie decides.”

“I’m in.” Leonie swiped the coin and tied it neatly against her belt. 

Claude’s smile gleamed. “Fantastic! I’ll let Ingrid stay around of course.”

Felix’s hackles rose, just as Ingrid turned her head to stare at Claude. “We work as a  _ pair _ .” 

“But neither of you know Faerghus, do you?” Claude leaned back and winked at Judith. “You’ll keep me updated,of course..”

Judith scoffed. “You’ll have to buy me more than a cheap breakfast and even cheaper ale to indulge in your little games.”

Claude shrugged. “Can’t say I didn’t try. Well, I’m off to visit with a friend of mine. Ingrid, send word if you need anything.” Claude rose, gracefully stretching his arms. “Oh - by the way, I’m hearing that our mysterious ghost likes to hide his identity behind a mask.” 

Felix’s stomach dropped.

“Good day everyone.” Claude waved and disappeared, stopping only at the bar to pay the tab.

“Something wrong?” Judith asked and Felix felt painfully exposed. 

“No.” Felix forced his body back into a state of calm. “It’s just a job.”

After a solid breakfast and using some of their newfound riches to at least shore up their weapons and gear, they headed north. Ingrid herself carried a spear and a short, sturdy horse with several bags upon it.

“The last report indicated an Imperial outpost not far from here was quietly hit late at night. About two day’s worth of traveling. Most of the soldiers that surrendered were rounded up and disappeared.” Ingrid led the way down an old gravel road leading towards a thick forest. Faerghus, when it was its own country, was surrounded by huge sprawls of rocky terrain and heavy woodland; a natural barrier that kept the kingdom safe from invaders but also denied it the trade routes like Leicester benefited from.

But none of that mattered now. None of it  _ should  _ matter. Felix gripped the hilt of his sword and kept his gaze forward, thinking only of the next job.

“Where are you getting your information?” Leonie asked as she kept pace with Ingrid. “I’ve heard lots of gossip about odd goings-on but most towns like gossip. It seems strange for someone to be kicking up trouble  _ now _ .”

“There were always rumors that the royal family wasn’t completely wiped out in the coup. Cornelia - “ Ingrid spat the name - “supposedly left all the bodies in Fhirdiad’s square. But - “ She turned, her hand gripping tighter to her reins, “the prince was beheaded.”

Leonie shuddered.

“So there are people risking their lives over some farce of a missing ruler?” Felix grimaced.

“Over someone standing up to Cornelia.” Ingrid glowered. “Your father  _ left _ . The rest of us - you don’t know what life was like before.”

Felix’s eyes narrowed. “My father’s in a dungeon because he was sending letters to  _ someone  _ and got caught. The only reason he’s still alive is so he can be an example.”

Ingrid turned away. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”

Leonie made a point of stepping between the two of them. “We’re on a mission. That’s the important part here, right? Not what happened in the past.”

“Yeah.” Felix bowed his head. He’d chosen this life - was still choosing this life. Mercenaries didn’t care about politics or phantom royals that may or may not exist.    
“What do you know about Claude anyway?” Leonie turned her attention to Ingrid. “He seems like an untrustworthy sort.”

“He is.” Ingrid shook her head. “I don’t know very much. After I presented as a Beta, my father sent me south so that I wouldn’t have to enlist in the Adrestian army or - “ her lip curled disdainfully - “pledging loyalty to the  _ Dukedom _ . Galatea - my home - is incredibly poor so we have nothing to offer besides bodies to be soldiers. I think he was hoping I’d be an Alpha so at least I’d have some sway in my life choices. I was put in touch with the Daphnels and Claude found me and asked me if I wanted to be a personal bodyguard.” She shrugged. “He’s always got something going on but he’ll never give you a straight answer.”

“He seems to have a lot of money.” Leonie rubbed thoughtfully at her chin. “He might be a spy for… someone. Or else an up and comer looking to get an in with Adrestia.”

For all the power they deployed, not much was known about the inner workings of the Adrestian government. There was an Emperor, supposedly, but said ruler was rumored to be a withered, weakened man with his children mad or dead by one another’s hands. He’d only wanted Alpha heirs and so it was rumored most of the family was in a constant state of backstabbing one another until no one remained.

That left the military itself to continually spread itself throughout the continent. Felix found the whole thing utterly stupid.

“If someone’s trying to fight off a whole Empire - they’re a fool.” Felix finally said.

“We all need something to live for.” Ingrid clutched at her cloak, fingers tightening into a fist. “Even if it’s just a stupid hope, at least it’s  _ hope _ .”

“And yet you want us to kill this person.” Leonie said, her voice dropping slightly.

Ingrid didn’t answer.

Two days later they arrived in a small outpost with bright red Adrestian flags hoisted high in the parapets. The ground was covered in a thin layer of snow, contrasting bleakly against the grey-stone of the building.

A guard watched them impassively, even as Leonie and Felix flashed their small scarves indicating their status as mercenaries. There were rules about mercenaries being in military lodgings - Felix had more than once threatened to cut someone if they took his sword away and yet it was a small price to pay for a warm bed and a roof.

Slowly, the huge iron gate groaned open and two men in bright red armor stepped forward, followed by a woman with dark brown hair knotted in a bun.

“We weren’t told you were coming.” She frowned, eyeing them warily. “Is there something we don’t know?”

“Just passing through on our way to the capital.” Leonie lied smoothly. “Have you had any trouble lately?”

The woman minutely flinched, so small that Felix barely caught it. “None.”

“Then you don’t mind if we sleep here tonight?”

“We don’t allow mercenaries “ She lifted her nose haughtily. “There’s a small town not far from here that you can beg for shelter at.”

“Your loss.” Leonie shrugged and turned on her heel. “Come on you two.”

They kept walking, Felix aware of the several eyes bearing down on them.

When the castle was out of sight, Leonie stopped, glancing around at the landscape. She crossed her arms and touched her chin thoughtfully. Her head went down to the ground as she traced the path and then looked up towards the tree line.

“What - “ Ingrid started and Felix raised his hand. They both watched as Leonie stepped towards a tree and looked up, considering.

“Someone’s been here.”

“In the tree?” Felix asked.

She nodded, reaching upwards to touch a broken branch. “Pretty good too - they wiped their footprints away when they got down. Look up -see how those branches have no snow on them?”

“I don’t follow.” Ingrid stood a little straighter. 

“There was someone spying on that outpost.” Felix started as Leonie nodded in agreement. 

“It’s going to be dangerous to sleep out here tonight.” Leonie mused quietly.

“Yeah.” Felix looked to Ingrid, then back towards the outpost. “May as well see what happens.”

Camping outside was a miserable experience.

Camping outside in the cold of the north was even worse than sleeping on wet, muddy ground.

They’d located a small outcrop of rocks that provided a little protection from the elements but even still, it was cold. Felix buried himself inside his thick fur cloak and stayed as close to their small fire as he could. Beside him, Leonie was barely visible beneath her own furs.

Ingrid had only a modest coat on, apparently unperturbed with the temperature. She was quietly tending to her spear and humming a song that tugged at Felix’s brain even though he couldn’t pinpoint why.

Old memories, best to be hidden deep where they would no longer hurt.

“What was it like? Before?” Leonie broke the silence to ask.

Ingrid looked up. She glanced thoughtfully in the general direction of the outpost and then back towards the fire. “I was too young to remember things clearly. But my father used to joke about Galatea being a lot of dirt and rocks but -  _ our  _ dirt and rocks. In Faerghus, everyone felt like a big family.” Ingrid swung her attention to Felix, again studying him. “I don’t know why your father chose to go to Leicster but - it surprised all of us. Your family and the king’s were tightly knit ever since Faerghus was founded.”

Felix snorted. “I wouldn’t know.” His father didn’t talk about Faerghus, especially after his mother’s death. Glenn only told him fairy tales, ones that involved foolhardy knights and hidden dragons.

“I see. Perhaps -” she shook her head and turned her attention back to the fire. “It’s unimportant.”

Silence fell again. Felix considered calling first watch - just by the stars it was close to midnight. The moon was big and bright at least, providing the bare minimum of light against the sharp dark shadows of Faerghus.

There was a flash of bright light from the direction of the outpost.

Loud horns sounded from inside. Then a scream - a sharp, guttural one. More and more shouts echoed through the night.

Felix grabbed his sword just as Leonie jumped to her feet.

A loud explosion echoed loudly through the darkness.

By the time they reached it, the whole outpost was in flames. Soldiers surged outwards, many of them underdressed or in various states of shock. The woman was nowhere to be seen. Felix wove through the chaos, looking for anyone and anything that stood out like a sore thumb. Leonie was somewhere to his right and he could hear Ingrid and her horse racing around the perimeter.

Felix caught a glimpse of someone covered in black, blending in with the shadows themselves. On instinct Felix ran after the retreating figure, even as Leonie shouted towards him.

The figure ran deep into the woods but this time Felix wasn’t deterred by rain. The fire burning freely at the outpost helped - the light from the chaos providing a yellow glow to their surroundings. He ran, his breath puffing in the dark air, every cell in his body absolutely certain that this was his prey. The figure stayed several meters ahead, almost daring Felix to chase him further.

Felix grit his teeth and withdrew his sword. The nerve of the stranger - the - 

Then the shadow disappeared behind a huge rock.

Felix stopped, swinging his gaze back and forth. He heard a few twigs snap somewhere to his right, crushed beneath some boot.

A strange, unfamiliar thrill rolled down his spine.

“You can come out now.” Felix warned, raising his sword. “I can hear you.”

Silence.

“Scared?” Felix stood straighter, defiant. “I’m not just any mercenary.”

“Is it true that you’ve been in every Alpha’s bed in Leicester?” a deep, smooth voice asked from behind him.

Felix snarled and turned, swiping at thin air. “Who’s asking?” His heart pounded, the thrill turning warm and hot and - 

“Or are you just biding your time for the best?” The figure moved again, a shadow against the flames. “A lost lover perhaps?”

Felix felt the snarl build in his throat even as his mind whispered to run - that he wasn’t at an advantage. “You’re full of shit.”

Felix caught a glimpse of a long spear. He glanced around, at the ground, at the logs piled up around their feet, at the distance from the outpost - 

He ran.

Behind him he heard footsteps, in front of him he heard more chaos. If he could find a better place to fight, if he could lead his foe towards a more advantageous fighting spot - 

He felt oddly dizzy as he ran, his body surging, something long asleep making itself known all over again. It was the air, the battle, the third of a real opponent instead of some bandits, surely, and - 

Felix was thrown to the ground by a buried root. He slid, colliding with the earth. His attacker descended on him and they wrestled, bodies twisting as they both fought for dominance.

Felix hissed as a hand wrapped around his throat, filled with fury and something wildly primal.

His attacker leaned forward above him, his mask gleaming in the darkness, lit only by the flames from behind them. Slowly the stranger’s hand went to his jaw, softly, hesitantly stroking it. Felix, despite himself raised his chin, exposing his neck, his Adam’s Apple bobbing - 

The stranger recoiled as a knife flew in his direction.

Leonie threw another and another, and the smell of blood floated through the air.

There was another quiet snap and Leonie jumped, an arrow knocking the next blade from her hand. Felix turned his head, catching a glimpse of a figure covered in white furs standing not too far away, another arrow drawn and aimed right at Leonie.

Felix’s attacker ran. And then, just as quickly, the other attacker disappeared into the Faerghus forest.

Felix’s heart pounded, his head swimming from the cold and the adrenaline and something suddenly, painfully miserable in his stomach.

“Felix!” Leonie ran over, helping him to his feet. “He didn’t hurt you did he? You all right?”

“I’m fine.” Felix swayed, trying to clear his mind. “Where’s Ingrid?”

“She’s heading for the town to warn them just in case. She told us she’d meet us there. All the soldiers have run off to Goddess knows where.” Leonie glowered in the general direction of their prey. “Guess we should have thought there’d be more than one of them.”

“We’ll find him.” Felix retrieved his sword from where it landed in the snow before his struggle. “We always find them.”

Leonie nodded.

That morning, clustered in their small hotel room, Felix woke up to a painful, crushing emptiness between his legs.

He buried his fingers deep inside himself and shuddered, his mind filled with  _ want _ .


	3. civil dawn

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Slight mention of a possibility of assaults' but nothing comes of it I promise but just in case - worldbuildling mention at the second scene, second paragraph

Felix fell ill upon the first snowfall of the season. His body was feverishly warm and he kept kicking his blankets off whenever a servant disappeared from the room. Daisy declared it a mere headcold that would resolve itself in a week and Felix - miserably - stared out the window at the untouched white ground.

He flopped his head against his pillow and let out a weak cough. Snow rarely fell so heavily in Leicester and it was a perfect time to challenge Alex to a snowball fight and build a rather impressive fort.

As if on cue, the door creaked open and Alex walked inside, holding tightly to a tray loaded up with awful herbal tea and some sort of bland soup Felix was certain Daisy selected just to torture him.

Alex settled on the edge of the bed, resting the tray upon his lap. “Can you sit up?”

Felix sniffled indignantly. “I’m not hungry.” He didn’t dare crawl into Alex’s bed and get his gross snot-germs all over it. “Tell Daisy it tastes awful.”

“I believe it’s supposed to.” Alex turned his attention to the window and Felix, even despite the fuzziness of his thoughts, noticed the way his gaze dimmed.

“What’s wrong?”

Alex blinked, turning his attention back to Felix. “I beg your pardon?”

“You have this look.” Felix tried to arrange his face in a mimicry of Alex’s but his nose felt all puffy. “Like you aren’t here.” His father had the same look whenever it started snowing too. The one time Felix asked him about it, Glenn muttered something about their mother and pulled Felix away to build a snow-monster.

“Oh.” Alex gently wrapped his fingers around the mug of tea. “It’s the snow.”

“Do you hate it?” Felix made an effort to sit up, if only because he was quickly learning Alex played dirty. Puppies had less dangerous pouts than Alex.

“No.” Gently Alex handed the mug over and helped Felix bring it to his lips. “I love it.”

The herbs and heat made it easier to breathe and briefly he could feel his head clear. “You can go outside, if you want. All servants get days off.”

Alex smiled. “Are you chasing me away?”

Felix snorted, or at least tried to. Mostly it came out as another round of stuffiness. “I just might.”

“My father used to take me sledding. We’d sneak out early and slide down a long hill.” Alex’s voice was soft, reverent. He took the mug away and handed Felix the small bowl of soup. “He rarely had time to solely focus on me.”

Alex rarely, if ever, talked about his past. Somehow he always managed to turn the subject around to swords or homework or flustering Felix about something ridiculous.

“Was your father a servant too?” Maybe that was it. Maybe he’d served a minor lord in Faerghus before the coup. Or maybe a soldier? Alex certainly knew his way around a weapon.

“Of a very large household.” Alex moved to set the tray on the end table. “Does it taste good today?”

Felix gagged. Still, he’d managed half before he set the bowl down and flopped back down on his pillow.

“Carry me outside.” If Alex could lift an entire casket of wine, surely carrying Felix would be easy.

“Miss Daisy would be displeased.” Alex settled down close and smoothed Felix’s sweaty bangs away from his forehead.

“How come you get to call her ‘Miss Daisy?’” Felix moved, just a little at first, and then rearranged himself so his head was comfortably against Alex’s thigh. The fabric of his trousers wasn’t gross with snot and sweat - yet, and the fingers trailing along his scalp felt nice.

Alex was humming, very soft and slightly off-tune. For some reason, the song felt familiar. A lullaby he heard as a child maybe.

“We’ll play in the snow.” Felix mumbled sleepily. “Soon.”

“Soon.” Alex agreed.

It had been a long time since Felix experienced the onset of a heat. He took suppressants every month with varying degrees of success and when that failed, powered through it by sheer stubbornness.

He tried to be as discreet as he could but it was impossible to hide his discomfort from Leonie. She didn’t care - they’d been partners for years after all, but Felix still felt exposed as she opened his door and fixed him with a pitying look.

Felix clenched his teeth and shook his head, forcing his thoughts back into some semblance of order. He heard Leonie moving about, he heard the door open and Ingrid make an indignant startled squeak and then the two of them whisper quietly with one another outside.

Everything was closer - too close - during a heat. He could smell the thick, cloying scent of Leonie’s cleaning oils and distantly, the woody, natural scent of Leonie herself. He could feel the roughness of the cheap, ratty sheets he was stuck in. Even his sweat was uncomfortable and stuck to his skin like heavy sludge.

There was one scent though that got his attention. It was faint- so faint he couldn’t quite make it out. Felix crawled out of bed on shaky legs and stumbled to the nearest chair where he’d set his coat overnight. It was still wet and muddy but it didn’t matter. Somewhere on the sleeve he could make it out the faintest whiff of - of - 

Felix palmed at himself and breathed. It was a wintry day in a pine forest, cool and fresh and clear. He wanted - _needed_ it and his stupid Omega body was stupidly turned on. Felix knew all about Alpha scents - how many supposedly highborn, _noble_ members of society would strengthen their scent and use all sorts of oils to make themselves more attractive to Omegas, peacocks using tacked-on feathers to cover up their own shortcomings. 

This though - this was clean. This was real and strong and dominant. Distantly, Felix knew he was trying to fill himself but fingers weren’t enough. Knuckles weren’t enough. Nothing would be enough except - 

Goddess. The scent was so  _ good _ .

Felix groaned and came for the first time that morning, slumping weakly against his already sweat-soaked sheets. He hated the empty feeling; the lack of warmth and someone’s arm wrapped tightly around his stomach. Someone else’s breath puffing gently against the back of his neck.

Just hormones.

It was all just hormones.

Felix refused to think otherwise.

Someone knocked on his door.

Groggily, Felix gripped the knife he kept under his pillow. Usually, Alphas weren’t stupid enough to take the smell of an Omega in heat as an invitation but better safe than sorry. He was already testy and lonely and not thinking straight. Felix knotted a towel around his bare waist and grimaced at how sensitive he still was.

He swung the door open and only saw Ingrid, her expression pinched and a slight blush on her cheeks.

“What?” She smelled very vaguely of fresh breezes. 

“I - sorry.” She held out a small, still-piping hot mug of tea that smelled of bitter herbs and mints. “This used to help out a friend of mine.”

Felix glowered. He swiped the mug and swallowed as quickly as he could. He grimaced, coughing once as the liquid traveled down his throat and settled in his stomach. “That’s disgusting.”

Ingrid crossed her arms.

“Thanks.” Felix breathed, forcing his irritation down. He didn’t trust her, but she didn’t deserve his ire. “For trying.”

“Yes, well.” She bowed her head and Felix watched her fidget with her gloves. “We’ve spent the morning trying to gather what information we can. If you’re feeling up to it - there’s going to be food downstairs.”

“I can handle it.” Already, he could feel the heat start to settle - for as rotten at it tasted, Ingrid’s drink was decidedly effective. “Give me fifteen minutes.” He’d need to clean up and Felix had no doubt all the basins in the small inn were full of nothing but icy water.

He could tolerate it. He had to.

“You don’t have to push yourself. If you need to stay in today - “ Ingrid started.

“It’s not even a real heat.” This was just some stupid hormonal response spurred on by climate or conflict or perhaps a new individual in Felix’s small social circle.

Or the thrill of being chased, of someone towering over him strong and powerful and -

Felix turned. “Tell Leonie I’ll be there.”

Food ended up being rock-hard bread and some kind of watery soup full of brown vegetables and paltry strips of meat.

“Sorry.” The waitress was a tiny woman with sun-red hair and a bright smile. She even smelled faintly like warm strawberry tarts baking in an oven. “We don’t have a lot of food in reserve right now. The Empire’s forces scared away a lot of the local wildlife and our best hunters were - “ her voice shook, her smile strained, “they get  _ selected  _ for assignments.”

“There’s always a war to fight in the Empire.” Ingrid muttered darkly as she stared down at the slab of bread.

Felix turned his attention to their surroundings, even as Leonie began asking the young woman about wildlife and the surrounding area. The tavern was normal enough - like the rest of the town it was small and held together by wood and stone and strangely silent given the violence of the night before. The few people that were huddled at various tables all looked elderly and various statues of haggard.

One table in the center had a small, pale white vase full of blue flowers. Felix narrowed his eyes, something tugging at his brain. 

Goddess, he hated how his thoughts kept drifting back to the  _ empty  _ feeling in his core.

“They’re called Kyphon Lilies.”

Felix jerked his attention back to stare at the redheaded woman. She smiled, tilting her head as though she was reading Felix’s thoughts. He glanced downwards, then back to Leonie and Ingrid. Both of them had stopped, waiting.

“They only grow where it’s cold.” Ingrid added, glancing between the two of them. “My father used to pick them and keep them on the window. They keep for months, if you know what to do Kyphon was supposed to be such a powerful swordsman, he once used the petals as blades to protect his best friend the king..”

“Oh - you’re from Fa - er, North Adrestia too?” The redhead’s smile twitched just slightly.

“A long time ago. I’m - looking for a friend of mine.” Ingrid stumbled out. “He was sent to join the Adrestian army and disappeared.”

“Oh. I think that happens a lot.” She awkwardly bowed her head. “My name’s Annie. Sorry that you had to come when - when all of this is going on.”

“You’re awfully calm given that someone attacked that outpost last night.” Leonie mused as she started drinking her soup. Leonie never wasted any food, even when it was completely tasteless. 

Annie’s smile twitched again. “I’m sure we’ll have some Imperial interrogators stop by sooner or later but - none of us know anything. Last night everyone was here arguing about what to do about clearing out some stones blocking the south road.”

“All of you?”

“All of us.” Annie bobbed her head. “It wasn’t very exciting.” She fidgeted with her apron for a moment. “Why are you here anyway?”

“We’re hunting for game.” It wasn’t a lie exactly. 

“Did anyone mention anything about a Winter King?” Ingrid switched topics, sitting a little straighter.

“The… oh. Yes, that.” Annie tapped her finger to her chin and glanced towards the lilies. “He’s supposed to be the ghost of King Loog himself. Or maybe the prince, back from the dead and kept alive until Faerghus’s enemies are dragged down into the eternal flames with him. It’s pretty creepy if you think about it. But for a lot of people - it’s very real. It’s said the king will return when his people need him and right now, I definitely need something other than potato and rabbit stew”

“It’s foolish to believe in some  _ ghost  _ for salvation.” Felix scoffed. No wonder Faerghus was so in shambles, if they kept expecting some fantasy to save them. “Don’t tell me you actually believe any of it.”

Annie didn’t look the least bit fazed. “Isn’t there anything you want from your past? More than anything? Any _ one _ ?”

Felix's throat tightened. “Nothing.”

“Funny. You look so - lonely, I guess.” Annie shook her head. “Sorry. I’m prying, I know, but - like I said, we don’t get random strangers here often.”

“Definitely  _ strange _ .” Leonie tapped her spoon against her bowl in thought. “Are there any other outposts or fortresses around here? Anything that a ghost king might care about?”

“A few along the way into Fhirdiad. But if I was, hypothetically of course,” Annie chuckled nervously to herself, “anyway. If I wanted to stick it to  _ Duchess  _ Cornelia, I’d do it a week from now when some high-ranking loyalists are getting together to celebrate ‘rejoining the Empire’ at the old Fraldarius estate.”

“ _ Fraldarius  _ estate?” Leonie’s eyebrows shot upwards. “There’s an estate?”

Felix tried very hard to keep very still.

“Most of the family scattered when the head disappeared into Leicester not long before the coup. I don’t think anyone ever figured out why. But right now it’s just a hub to house Empire nobility whenever they want to  _ visit _ .” She huffed. “I hope the place eats them.”

He didn’t care.

He  _ didn’t _ .

“Anyway. Enjoy the meal! It’s on the house.” She winked. “Be careful out there.”

“I didn’t know.” Felix viciously scrubbed his coat clean in the small bath area of the inn. The smell - the damned  _ smell  _ \- was still there and he could feel the slightest bit of dampness between his legs. “About any of it.”

“It is weird.” Leonie’s own clothing was arranged neatly on a makeshift line to dry. She sat cross-legged, carefully stitching up the tears in the fabric of one of her favorite shirts. “Did your father never talk about it at all?”

“No. My brother said it was about our mother. I just figured it didn’t matter.” The soapy water slopped around and around and he had a brief memory of stumbling inside with Alex after a particularly muddy session in the gardens.

Maybe he  _ had  _ been too reckless when it came to his own clothing. It was different when you were cleaning it yourself.

“I keep feeling like we’re in over our heads here.” Leonie bit down on the thread in her needle. “Catching some random ghost is one thing but - there’s something else going on. I wouldn’t be surprised if there really is a rebellion led by someone that hates the Empire.”

That just meant trouble. “It doesn’t matter. Our mission is our mission.” Felix paused. “Where’s Ingrid?”

“She said she’d be purchasing some supplies before we head north.”

“So she’s sending a letter to Claude?”

“Probably.” Leonie stood up and stretched. “I don’t trust her but - I like her. And no offense Felix but - you re kind of cranky a lot of the time.”

Felix tossed soapy water at her and Leonie, being Leonie, dodged. 

Felix heard noise downstairs.

He cracked one eye open and saw nothing out of the ordinary - somewhere to his left near the window Leonie was mumbling in her sleep. Ingrid’s room on the opposite side was silent; or at least quiet enough to not be noticeable through the wall.

Still, something made him slide out of bed and grab onto his knife. He moved slowly down the thin set of stairs towards the tavern area.

Only two small candles were set against the desk area, highlighting the shadows on the wall. Felix caught a flash of blue and - 

“Oh!” Annie jumped, colliding with a chair. There was a loud crash, then another, and then the candlelight disappeared.

Felix ran over to fumble in the darkness until he felt her shoulder. She whimpered, rubbing the back of her head.

“Are you hurt?” He relaxed only slightly as she lit a match and provided the barest bit of light.

“No. Nothing I won’t shake off in the morning.” Annie sighed. “I thought I heard someone moving about but, well, think it was just the town cat. He likes to sneak in and knock over everything. I call him Grumpy Meow-Meow.” She stood up slowly and used the match to light another candle. “Anyway. Just checking on things. The man who usually guards the inn came down with a stomach flu.”

Felix’s eyes narrowed.

“I shouldn’t be too long. Although - since you’re here.” Annie went back to the desk and sorted around. “Someone left this for you.”

Felix felt a surge of wariness even as he stepped forward. “Who?”

“I’m not sure.” She held out a small plain box made of plain wood. “But he said he hoped to see you soon.”

Felix’s eyes narrowed. He opened the box, expecting the worst.

It was a dagger, plain and unrefined save for the shining blue beads knotted around the hilt. 

Felix’s hands shook.

He was being called out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *headsmash* y'all I really swear this was only supposed to be like, three chapters long


	4. the blue hour

Felix’s eyes were watery. His cheeks were bright red and puffed out. He clung to his sword and steadied himself and began swinging his weapon with renewed vigor, trying to juggle it between his hands and move his feet in a way that was all too familiar and painfully nostalgic.

Lambert taught him that move and later, Rodrigue taught it to Glenn..

Glenn was incredibly talented and any time Rodrigue’s two sons sparred, Felix ended up on the ground. Glenn claimed it was simply height and skill - Felix claimed it was cheating.

Rodrigue always expected to have his hands full with two boys, even when his wife was alive. But there was something simultaneously impressive and daunting about a younger son that cried whenever he failed but was too stubborn to give up.

Rodrigue sighed as Felix stumbled and landed on the ground again, his sword clattering uselessly to his side. Slowly, he walked forward and knelt down as Felix began tugging forcefully at his hair and getting more and more red-faced.

“You can cut this if you want.” Rodrigue soothed as he swept a long strand of sweaty hair away from Felix’s forehead.

“No.” Felix stubbornly reached up to knot his hair back, his stubby fingers making awkward work of his hair. “It’s fine.”

He had his mother’s hair - long and slick. When she was alive, she’d always brush Felix’s hair at the start of the morning and tie it back with a complicated sweep of clips and ribbons.

She was much better at handling Felix than Rodrigue ever was. 

“What’s in Faerghus?”

Rodrigue stilled.

“Glenn said he learned how to do that move in Faerghus.” Feix stubbornly fixed his father with an accusatory look. “When was he in Faerghus?”

“A long time ago.” Rodrigue’s chest ached terribly. “You were a baby.”

“When am I going there?”

“Don’t you like Leicester?” Rodrigue felt his heart ache; his throat tighten. He’d made his peace with his decision, as much as he could, and there was no going back. Not now. Not so long as he was chained to a hollow promise of his own security..

“I want to learn how to fight with a sword.” Felix seemed calmer, his gaze sharp and his hands tight around his small weapon.

Rodrigue smiled. “What about when you fall in love with an Omega?”

“Only if they can swing a sword  _ better  _ than me.” Felix nodded his head in term determination. “And I’m going to be the best.”

“Felix - “ Rodrigue squeezed his youngest’s hand very gently. “If it ever comes to love or to duty - choose love.”

Felix haughtily glanced away. “Love sounds gross.”

Rodrigue smiled. “Maybe so. Also - you just need to move your wrist more.” He took the sword away from Felix and tossed it casually between his hands. “Like this - see?”

“No wonder your dad moved from here.” Leonie drawled.

The Fraldarius estate was inside of a sprawling town surrounded by high black-stone walls. Felix felt an uncomfortable tug of familiarity as he noticed the muted market square and the wary way the merchants watched everything around them. Soldiers in blood red armor were posted at every corner and people in plain blue clothing hastily finished their business to dart away again. The ground was mostly clear, most of the remaining snow trampled by boots and wheels.

Felix knew, deep inside, it wasn’t supposed to be like this. That the whole thing was  _ wrong. _

“Looks like the Empire’s using this at its eastern base of operations.” Ingrid grumbled as she clutched tightly to her horse’s reins. “They’re tightening security.”

“Who’s supposed to be in charge?” Felix’s gaze went to the large, looming stone manor and the bright red Adrestian flags that hung from each turret. Their home in Leicester was open and built with plenty of flowers and hedges and airy training areas that Felix made use of. This was almost deliberate in its design to be as mocking and menacing as possible.

“Hard to say. Whatever general is flattering Cornelia at the moment. Right now I think it’s some noble named Randolph.”

The three of them walked through the market square, trying to be as unobtrusive as possible. Not that there was much to look at - the weapons were all old farm tools and rusted lances and the food stalls only contained root vegetables and small dried pieces of jerky. The thick furs offered by worn hunters all seemed to be the same distinct shade of brown or white. 

Alex always liked looking at the fabric and jewelry stalls, fascinated by the tiny artisanry involved in embroidery and working small beads onto thin pieces of string. Felix found it all a little boring but the one day a redheaded merchant spent half an hour working flowers into Alex’s golden hair had been - 

Felix forced down the memory. He needed to focus.

Leonie hummed quietly. “How many ways are there to get inside?”

Ingrid shrugged. “Most estates in Faerghus are built so that everyone could disappear inside it when the winter turned harsh. So there’s usually one main entrance - that gate there - “ she pointed to a looming iron gate where four muscular sentinels stood at the ready and a mess of wagons and horses waited in some kind of vague order - “but there are plenty of entrances once you get in, especially if someone is planning some kind of feast.”

“It’s not impossible to climb those walls - especially with all the old trees around the perimeter.” Leonie rubbed thoughtfully at her chin as she surveyed the outer perimeter of the manor. The jagged, outwards-facing metal edges were more decoration than genuine danger. 

“But it would be stupid.” Felix rested his hand against his hip, just above where he’d tucked his new dagger. No point in wasting a weapon, even if it was from some stranger with a death wish. “Leonie, you remember those bandits from Gloucester?”

Leonie hummed. “They liked to pretend they were minstrels and sneak in as part of a troupe.”

Ingrid took a deep breath. “I am still a Galatea. My father doesn’t have a lot of clout but he’s still a noble with marriage potential. I might be able to get us inside.” She nodded to herself, considering. “It should work. Assuming you don’t mind an Imperial taking offense and throwing you inside a jail cell.”

“We’d better work on our street performing then.” Leonie grimaced, self-consciously touching her sleeve. 

As it turned out, quite a number of individuals had the same idea. Several Adrestian soldiers hustled about, checking each and every wagon that rolled up. Crates groaned as they were pried open and merchants howled about potential damage done to their goods. Groups dressed in bright colors gamboled about and juggled, at least until one of the soldiers shooed them away.

Too many smells intermingled and Felix could already feel a headache forming behind his temples. He clenched his teeth and breathed as slowly, slowly, they advanced.

Ingrid straightened, her horse still and calm behind her. Leonie and Felix stood two steps back, keeping their hands on their weapons just in case.

“Why are you here?” A short, stocky woman in red asked as she crossed her arms. 

“My name is Ingrid Brandl Galatea.” Ingrid announced without a hint of nervousness. “I’m here on behalf of my house.”

The woman snorted. “Never heard of you.”

Ingrid’s lips twisted sharply. “I’m the niece of Judith Daphnel and serve Claude von Riegan.”

_ Von Riegan _ ? Leonie mouthed to Felix. Felix was equally vexed - von Riegan was old and had no heirs.

Did he?

That made the woman’s breath catch as she glanced back towards another soldier. She stiffened, shaking her head. “Don’t care. You have no business being here.”

“I asked her to come.”

The three turned their heads to see a woman with soft brown hair to their left. She smiled, gesturing towards a horse-pulled wagon filled with cheese and breads and fresh vegetables.

Ingrid stiffened as the woman stepped forward to display a small card. The soldier huffed and glowered at all of them.

“You know where the kitchens are.” The soldier waved her hand and turned her attention to the rest of the crowd.

The light-brown haired woman smiled again and turned to Ingrid. She wore a fairly simple brown dress with blue lilies embroidered all along the scarf she wore knotted around her neck. 

She smelled like cinnamon pastries - a strong, soothing, decidedly  _ Alpha  _ smell..

Briefly, Felix thought of Annie.

“Follow me please.”

_ Trap _ . Leonie mouthed.

Felix nodded.

“My name is Mercedes.” The woman - Mercedes - led them all along the cobbled path towards the left side of the manor. “I was hoping to run into some mercenaries.”

Inside, the manor was far more impressive and well-kept. There were soldiers everywhere but just as many hedgerows and flower gardens. Several statues were covered in vines and snow and many had clearly been replaced by newer works of art with different bases..

Felix felt a phantom ache as he saw rows of the same flowers that his mother favored and Rodrigue kept all through their childhood. Alex sometimes tended to them during his downtime, even as Felix fussed over Alex scratching his hands on their hidden thorns.

“It’s a little dangerous to try and run the kitchen, especially during big events. Having a mercenary or two around deters some of the less honorable staff from trying to smuggle food out.” Mercedes continued. “I hope you don’t mind.”

“You’re being awfully trusting.” Felix said, sweeping his gaze all around. “We could be here to kill someone.”

“You could.” Mercedes stopped the wagon as several people in matching outfits stood in attendance. “But you seem like terribly kind people. I’ll have to get you fitted with the appropriate attire of course, but that shouldn’t take long.”

Felix snorted.

“Besides - the soldiers here aren’t exactly helpless. Between Randolph and Margrave Gautier - “

“I beg your pardon,” Ingrid said, sharp and stiff. “Did you say Gautier?”

Mercedes nodded. “He’s one of the visiting lords tonight. So is Count Rowe.”

Felix didn’ miss the way Ingrid’s face twisted in open disgust.

Rodrigue didn’t have many formal events in Leicester. Their visitors were usually soldiers and an occasional visiting noble but rarely did Felix’s father hold court in Leicester. Their kitchen was run with a vicious sort of efficiency, assuming Felix and Glenn weren’t indulging in mischief.

This though - this was chaos. Loud Alphas barked orders and chefs and servants hustled about, dodging one another in some elaborate, practiced dance. Felix found himself stepping back almost subconsciously to avoid being trampled on. There were so many little things to watch for - hands, body language, if someone seemed just a  _ little  _ too clumsy with their food..

Leonie was faring somewhat better, mingling with several of the chefs as she purveyed their work with a critical gaze. She kept passing by a short meat chef with light grey hair and asking questions as he smiled and nodded along.

Ingrid stood sourly by the entrance but Felix couldn’t help but notice there was still some remaining bitterness in her stance.

Eventually, she stood straighter and marched over to where Mercedes was directing several servants holding cold bottles of wine. Felix’s eyes narrowed and he glanced at Leonie.

Leonie nodded.

Ingrid snatched a bottle and marched out through a door.

Felix followed.

“You know there’s something else going on here.” Felix muttered as he walked a few steps behind Ingrid. “Something we really don’t need to be in the middle of.”

“I have business to attend to.” Ingrid replied, walking steadily through the hallways towards - something. Around them the noise of cooking and servants shifted into string music and conversation.

The hallway opened into a wide area full of finely-dressed guests. Above them, sparkling chandeliers glittered with individual lights. Bright red drapery hung everywhere, glittering against gold accents.

And soldiers. Far more soldiers, dressed in armor and dressed in plain clothes, stood at the ready.

Felix’s senses were heightened with the stench of Alphas intermingling. Goddess, why did anyone think they were attractive this way?

A few guests glanced their way and Felix stood straighter, summoning up all the  _ noble  _ haughtiness he’d been brought up with. 

His hands itched for his sword. It was safe - tucked away in a small room that Mercedes provided for them but - he felt utterly naked without it.

Ingrid swerved. She approached a group of people - Alphas - and marched directly up to a tall, thin man with dark red hair. He wore shimmering black finery and smelled like an icy morning.

“Your drink  _ sir _ .” Ingrid held the bottle out, challenging him.

The man turned. His face was angular and older, the barest hints of grey on his temple. There was no mistaking him for anything but Alpha.

He adjusted his cravat and Felix saw blue lilies glimmering on his cufflinks.

Felix’s mind howled at him.

“Galatea, isn’t it?” The man looked at Felix, then back at the others he was speaking to. “Randolph, if you don’t mind, I’ll step away for a moment. Perhaps you can take this opportunity to look over the letters I brought you. Do enjoy the wine.”

Randolph was young and smelled of blood and iron. He eyed Felix and Felix looked away.

“Friends of yours?” Randolph asked, barely hiding his curiosity. 

“Of the family.”

Ingrid scowled as the redheaded man blithely raised his hand for her to follow.

Felix’s lip curled despite himself. Glenn once spread a rumor about Felix defeating Alphas and eating their hearts and right now, he was almost considering it.

The man led them to a small side-room. It was clean and full of old, worn furniture. He closed the door and settled into a chair next to turned-over drinking glasses.

“Where is he?” Ingrid and Felix said in tandem.

The man raised an eyebrow, even as Felix and Ingrid glanced at each other.

Had Ingrid realized it too? Or was it the “old friend” she was looking for?

Or did she know who the Winter King was?

Some unfamiliar, twisting emotion settled tight in Felix’s chest at the thought. Jealousy?

Why would he be  _ jealous? _

“Your guess is as good as mine. But,” the man casually uncensored the bottle Ingrid handed to him and poured himself a glass of the deep red liquid, ‘i suspect who you’re looking for is quite close.”

“ _ You  _ sent him away.” Ingrid accused. “Sylvain - he never even made it to the outpost. He can’t be dead so where  _ is  _ he?”

“Sylvain?” Felix asked, trying to piece together the missing picture.

“My youngest son. You would not have met him.” The man looked up at Felix, considering. “Felix, isn’t it?”

Felix’s hand went to his dagger.

“This is indeed quite - prophetic, I suppose. A Fraldarius finally returned to his ancestral home.” The man sipped his wine, apparently unconcerned. 

“How did you know? “ Ingrid started. Her lips twisted downwards again, her fists clenching at her sides. “You Gautiers are all bastards.”

Margrave Gautier then. Felix didn’t know a single thing about the family but he knew enough to be wary. The man’s eyes were icy sharp - just like Judith’s without the latter’s quiet amusement.

“A Fraldarius will always find his way back to the king, sooner or later. It’s in your blood.”

Felix scoffed but he still felt slightly unsettled. “You don’t know my father then. He  _ left  _ your country.”

“And who do you think sent him away?”

Felix’s hackles rose. 

“Lambert always did have a misguided sense of mercy. And Rodrigue was far too upstanding and  _ devoted  _ \- “ Margrave Gautier’s eyes darkened, “to tell him no. Perhaps things would have been different if he stayed.”

Ingrid growled.

“Or perhaps, after Cornelia spun her pretty little web, the next obvious target would have been the Duke and his two children.” The Margrave smiled with just a tinge of bitterness. “We’ve all had to make choices for our children, it seems.”

Outside, there was a shuddering groan, then a huge crashing sound.

“Well.” Margrave raised his glass. “To the return of Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd.”

Time stopped and all Felix could feel was the sudden tightness in his chest and all he could see were bright blue eyes and golden hair.

No.

Surely…

It couldn’t be.

“Felix?” Ingrid looked warily at the door. “We need to see what’s happening out there.”

Felix stumbled to the door. His hand shook, even as he forced his mind on the noise outside. It didn’t matter.

It  _ didn’t matter. _

“Let’s go.”

Outside, the huge chandeliers were in shattered pieces along the floor. Several of the candles were burning freely against the plush carpets and soldiers were quickly moving about to protect the scattered guests. Servants ran in circles, hastily cleaning up the mess as best they could.

Felix’s eyes scanned around and around as Ingrid grabbed onto a nearby flag hung onto a pole and wrapped it into a makeshift spear.

They approached along the wall, wary, and - 

Felix’s already pounding heart went into overdrive as his body warmed.

He knew that smell. Faint, buried beneath other acrid Alpha scents and yet - 

“Get to Leonie and make sure she’s safe.” Felix’s mouth went dry. There was no way but there it was, pungent, enthralling…

“Felix, what - “ Ingrid nodded. “Meet you later in the kitchens.”

Felix sprinted towards another hallway. He pushed past stumbling guards and rattled servants, all attention fixed on the scent. It was stronger - so much stronger and he wanted,  _ needed _ \- 

There, Randolph was sitting at the end of a long table, several scrolls rolled out in front of him.

His eyes were open and vacant, his mouth an odd purple color. His wine glass was tipped over and the liquid dripped down onto the floor.

Corpses were littered on the ground as well, wine goblets all overturned.

Felix shuddered, nausea and wariness fighting against a rush of  _ want _ at the cool scent that mixed in with the smell of death. There was - 

Someone’s hand wrapped around his waist. Felix’s hand went to his hip but someone else’s hand grabbed his, holding tightly as Felix was yanked back into the shadows behind a huge drape of red. There was a quiet groan and the space was shrouded in darkness.

Felix’s pulse pounded as the hand loosened, someone’s fingers curling curiously around his dagger. Felix considered kicking the stranger but there was no way in the Eternal Flames to do so without drawing attention to himself.

“You’re wearing it.” A low, guttural voice murmured with the barest hint of approval.

“I’m going to shove it in your chest.” Felix whispered back, even as his body preened. 

It wasn’t him. Just another Alpha, another target to be taken down. Alex was gone, never to be replaced, never to be found again.

Felix was a mercenary. He lived for the job.

Mercenaries didn’t have feelings, especially for renegade rebels with blood on their hands.

“Meet me tomorrow evening at the stones by the lake north of here. I give you my word I will be there.” The stranger - the Winter King - let go.

Felix spun, launching a fist upwards. He collided with the other’s shoulder and for a brief moment they fought, the only sound the rush of breath and the scrabble of fabric as Felix fought, tooth and nail against an opponent he couldn’t see.

And then he was pushed backwards and the secret tunnel opened outwards.

Margrave Gautier was there. Before Felix could think the other man burst forward. On instinct Felix grabbed for his dagger. Magrave Gautier spun, yanking Felix’s wrist and dagger upwards to the Margrave’s neck.

Soldiers burst inside, led by a man with a bushy moustache. The man’s eyes bulged wide, first with horror and then with rage.

Felix forced his heartbeat to settle as he debated whether to speak or stay in silence. With their backs turned he could make quick work, at least take down two of them - 

“It seems like I’ve been caught in the act.” Margrave Gautier drawled, as calm and emotionless as he was discussing the weather.

“What did you do, you Faerghus fool?” the moustached man growled. “You know you’ll hang for this.”

“Randolph and Count Rowe were looking into my family’s finances. He would have found my first son’s little embezzlement scheme if I didn’t stop them.” Margrave Gautier sighed, dramatically looking towards the scrolls on the table. “I suppose I was too reckless though. You know us Gautiers - “ the Margrave’s smile was, for the briefest of moments, almost genuine. “We’re all bastards.”

The night passed in a blur. Felix didn’t remember much beside question after question after question and very little answers to give. Mercedes eventually herded him back, promising a strict inventory of all the wines and food brought into the manor.

Ingrid was painfully silent and stiff when he found her and Leonie tucked quietly away in a servant’s bedroom, the fire flickering shadows against the wall.

“Did he really do it?” She finally asked, looking to Felix for something he wasn’t sure he could give.

“I don’t know.” Felix rubbed at the bridge of his nose. He’d thought he’d had his heat under control but the loneliness seemed to have only gotten worse - a gaping maw of emptiness that refused to be ignored any longer. 

“Well - if he did or if he didn’t, we’ve got all of Adrestia thinking we caught a traitor. That’s going to get us a lot of attention.” Leonie shook her head. “And a lot of trouble.”

“Margrave Gautier - he was always cold, but he wasn’t cruel.” Ingrid sighed and rested her chin on her knees. “Sylvain presented as an Omega early. He was likely going to be married off to an Imperial  _ noble  _ to tighten ties and gain more legitimacy in the country.” Ingrid nearly spat the words. “And then the Margrave sent him to join the military. I never saw him again.”

Felix’s stomach twisted and it took everything inside of him to not leave the room. “There’s no point in looking.”

Ingrid glowered. “I’m not giving up. He’s out there. I just have to find him.”

“Life’s not that kind.” Mothers died. Fathers were ripped away. Brothers didn’t get glory. And the person you wanted most was - 

“You’re just bitter.” Ingrid sighed and buried herself beneath her blankets. “I’ll do more investigating in the morning.”

“I want to talk to one of the chefs. He felt very familiar.” Leonie mused as she settled down into her own pillows. “His hands - well, call it a hunch.”

Felix didn’t sleep at all.

He listened as Ingrid and Leonie moved about the next morning but Felix didn’t have the energy to do much. He thought of his father, of his brother, of Alex’s quiet, shy smiles and the dull sadness as the blonde looked northwards.

He thought about secrets long buried and a history he’d never cared to learn.

Felix didn’t like to think so deeply. He didn’t like to touch at that dark, lonely pit in his stomach. Nothing good ever came of it.

Sometimes he wished he didn’t feel at all.

“Felix?”

Felix blinked fuzzily and looked at the doorway. Mercedes was holding onto a steaming drink and a small sandwich.

Felix grunted.

“I’ve told everyone you felt a little overwhelmed by last night. But I think it’s about time you woke up, don’t you?”

Felix sat up, wary. “What do you know?”

She smiled beatifically. 

“The lily on your scarf.” Slowly, Felix untangled himself from his blankets. He was hungry but more than hat, he felt - untethered. Anxious. Something important was set to happen and he wasn’t sure what.

“It’s quite cute, don’t you think?” Mercedes handed him his plate and sat primly on the edge of the bed. 

“Seems very popular.” Felix drawled as he gnawed on the edge of the sandwich. It was plain but - filling and rather peppery.

“In the right circles.” Mercedes kept smiling.

“Have you ever heard of a Grumpy Meow-Meow?”

Mercedes, to her credit, didn’t even flinch. “He is a very naughty cat, I am told.” She waited, patiently, as Felix devoured the late lunch.

Felix rubbed at his eyes and breathed.

He’d see this through.

“They’ll be safe. If you need to leave.” Mercedes took the empty dish and cup away. “They’re both quite strong individuals.”

“Yeah.”

He had a mission to fulfill.

Faerghus was wild. Primal, in a way that Leicester was not. In Leicester, Felix felt as though he was prepared for anything. But deep inside the forest, even this close to an Imperial stronghold, Felix couldn’t help but feel he was being watched by something very old.

The lake had been easy enough to find. The stones were more difficult but as he walked forward, he realized they were impossible to miss. They sat there, jagged and looming, as though some ancient giant simply placed them in some confusing pattern.

These could have been his lands, once.

And somehow, walking through them settled something in his blood.

Felix walked, head held high, his hand against the hilt of his sword. Whatever was going to happen - it was  _ supposed  _ to happen here.

Felix was prepared.

There was someone waiting at the edge of the water for him.

The king was just as horrible as the rumors said.

He was tall, made taller still by the thick furs that wrapped around his still form. It wasn’t just the furs of any beast either - the thick cloak was made from the finest and fiercest Sreng wolves. Alphas in Adrestia paid entire life savings for such dangerous game. In his right hand the king held onto a lance made of bone and steel and his face - 

His face was obscured by a grotesque, full-faced mask crafted to look leonine with sharp, twisting fangs.

Perhaps it had all been an illusion in Felix’s mind and the king was indeed nothing but a ghost cobbled together to resemble a living person. Perhaps he really was an old king made flesh, ancient and weathered and worn.

Even still, Felix’s blood  _ burned _ .

“You came.” The king spoke with a low, deep intonation, made gravely by the presence of the mask.

“What do you want?” As if Felix would ever retreat from a challenge.

“You.”

Felix fought the sudden urge to preen. It was utterly irrational and alien and - 

And yet his mind drifted back to several nights ago, wrapped in heat and  _ hunger _ .

“You know I’ve only come to cut you into shreds.” Felix replied, withdrawing his blade. It wasn't the same one he carried earlier - this one was a gift from Glenn meant only for single combat. Felix didn’t dare dirty its metal with the blood of lowly, weak-willed .ruffians.

But a so-called “king” was another story.

The king tilted his head. “And if you lose?”

Felix scoffed. “Then I die.”

“If I lose, I accept. You may plunge your weapon into my heart. But if I win,” the king slowly shed his outer cloak revealing a slender form clad in black fabric, “you will agree to be my mate and bear my children. Is that acceptable?”

As if he’d ever bear the pups of - of anyone else. As if another Alpha could ever stir his instincts again. “You can try.”

“I know.” The king gripped his lance and took a step forward. “On your mark.”

Felix launched himself forward.

The king swung his lance too easily, spurred on with inhuman strength. Felix dodged the counter, forced backwards with each thrust of his opponent’s weapon.

He was at a disadvantage. Felix was fast - fast enough to cut through the most chaotic of bandit attacks. But speed meant nothing when he couldn’t even get close enough for it to matter.

Felix stepped back, again and again, ceding ground. His heart thundered as he knocked another strike away, his opponent almost toying with him. The insolence… the  _ arrogance _ made Felix’s head spin.

He kicked his opponent’s shin with his boot and the king darted back, leaving a momentary opening. Felix leaned in, sword raised and the king spun, taking the strike on his elbow.

The scent of blood filled the air, filled Felix’s lungs like an intoxicating perfume. He shuddered, breath knocked out of him as the spear swung back again, clashing with his sword.

Felix darted away just as his opponent did.

They stared at each other, Felix suddenly very, very...

Sweaty?

Damn his opponent for being quick. Damn him for being strong. Skilled. A good, strong choice, perfect for - 

_ No. _

Felix hissed and lunged forward, wilder, infuriated. His fist collided with the damn mask with a strength he didn’t know he had. The king took the blow and used it to fall backwards just as Felix slashed at thin air. 

The king parried, over and over again, always just a step too far away to draw more blood. And Felix needed to dig his teeth into the other’s neck, taste him,  _ open for him _ …

_ What the  _ **_fuck_ ** _. _

He wasn't interested.

He  _ wasn’t _ .

He missed the strike aimed at his shoulder.

Felix fell onto his back, just as the lance thrust downwards, right up against this throat.

“Do you submit?”

Felix gazed upwards, dazed, dizzy, to see a half-cracked mask and one blue eye staring back at him with a focus that made him shudder with  **want** .

The king pulled his mask off entirely, revealing - 

“You.” Felix choked out because of course it was. Of  _ course _ .

There was no other way it could go.

Messy blonde hair and an angular nose. Not a beast nor a ghost at all. A very familiar person that deep inside Felix  _ knew  _ he was made for.

_ What the  _ **_fuck_ ** _. _

He needed…

He  _ needed _ .

“Do you submit?” the king -  _ Alex  _ \- 

Dimitri - 

asked.

_ Fuck you _ , Felix wanted to say.

“Fuck  _ me _ .” he moaned out.


	5. the golden hour

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quick note for some upcoming violence and mention of dissociation / depression in the 3/4 stretch.

Felix wasn’t aware how they ended up where they did. His mind was in a broken haze, unfamiliar urges coiling and battering at his common sense and he could only cling to the other as the heat grew and grew in his very being. This wasn’t happening. It couldn’t be real. Goddess, he wanted it to be real.

He was laid on something soft - a bed of furs and thick fabric - and Felix’s head spun. He wanted this. He wanted to fight. He wanted to fuck. He wanted Dimitri to mark him up in every way imaginable. He’d prove he wasn’t some tender, soft Omega to be coddled.

Dimitri pulled Felix’s trousers off and stripped them both down and Felix snarled, torn between his natural inclination to keep fighting and utter relief as cold air hit his burning skin.

“I’m going to tear you to shreds for making me wait. For  _ leaving  _ me.” Felix promised, just as Dimitri mouthed at his throat. “I’m going to - “ He clawed at Dimitri’s hair, his shoulders, anything he could touch.

By  _ Wilheim’s ugly teeth _ . Felix’s mouth went painfully dry as he noticed Dimitri’s huge cock, already half-erect and oh-so-close, Dimitri starting to rub against Felix’s thigh. It was big - too big - it was going to fill him up so perfectly, remake him, and - he could take it. Why wouldn’t he be able to take it?. The dampness between his legs was all the confirmation he needed that he was ready.

“I know.” Dimitri purred, gently “I’ll be good for you. You’ve been so patient. ”

“I thought you were dead.” Felix lifted his hips up, thrashing about as Dimitri  _ licked  _ at him. “That you’d left me. You  _ bastard.  _ You left me.”

“I know.” Dimitri soothed between laps of his too-hot tongue. His  _ teeth  _ scraped against Felix’s thigh and slick leaked out in a way that was alarmingly unfamiliar and  _ right _ . “You’re perfect.”

“Do it, fuck, I want -  _ fuck _ !” Felix howled as Dimitri’s tongue pushed  _ inside _ , again and again, greedy, wrong, not big enough, not - “Now!”

Obediently, Dimitri loomed over him. His calloused hands wrapped around Felix’s hips, angling him just so and finally -  _ fucking finally  _ \- Felix felt the press of that cock against his entrance.

It was too big. It was too hot. It was  _ perfect _ . Felix shuddered, ignoring the gentle way that Dimitri’s blue eyes fixated on him -  _ only him  _ as Dimitri pressed in, steady, patient, letting Felix feel each and every stretch.

He buried his face against Dimitri’s shoulder and whined, bent practically in half and it still was not enough. It was never going to be enough until he became full, until he was round and heavy, his mind, his entire being wanted this,  _ needed  _ this….

“Dimitri.” Dimitri stilled, shuddering, made a tiny little gasp at the sound of his breath.  _ Ah _ , “Dimitri.” Dimitri pushed in, his hands tangled into Felix’s hair, possessive, desperate to hear his name from Felix’s lips.

They moved, clumsily finding a rhythm as the bed groaned beneath them. Felix kissed, touched, listened approvingly to the little growls Dimitri made above him.

“I’m going to - “ Dimitri started, hesitating and Felix felt it, the thrusts getting more and more erratic, his knot flaring out and locking them together. “Felix, I - “

“Yes,  _ yes _ .” Felix replied, greedy, and somehow still being stretched and it was amazing, it was perfect. Dimitri’s thrusts were unsteady and his cock was impossibly big inside, just what Felix wanted and - 

Goddess. How did something feel so incredibly good?

He bit down on Dimitri’s neck and a sweet, heady taste filled his mouth. Felix saw white, just as Dimtiri groaned and came and came and came. Felix clenched down, or tried to, so relieved to be so  _ full _ .

They flopped onto the furs, Dimitri still locked inside Felix. Like he was always supposed to be. Dimitri rolled them both on their sides and tried to awkwardly find a comfortable position. Felix refused to be helpful, still floating off heat and pheromones.. He ran his fingers over his belly, down to where they were still connected and hummed to himself, surrounded by the heat and taste of his mate.

_ Mate _ .

“Which one are you really?” Felix asked as Dimitri’s fingers started petting his hair, still a little clumsy and hesitant. “Was Alex - were you - “

“I am myself.” Dimitri replied, soft, steady. “I always have been.”

Something inside Felix’s chest started to loosen. There was much - so much - to ask but it was hard to think straight with Dimitri’s knot still inside him. “Oh.”

“I’m sorry.” Dimitri bit gently into Felix’s throat. Felix sniffed indignantly - demanding still more and Dimitri obliged, sucking at the skin in apology. “For making you wait so long.”

“You should be.” Felix half-murmured and, despite himself, smiled.

It was an old myth that an Omega, upon being mated, became  _ settled _ . That they went soft and started wanting pups and “learned” to be docile to their Alpha. 

Felix had always been of the opinion that whoever thought up that particular rumor needed to have their throat slit. As if an Omega was nothing but a switch waiting to be flipped by some fool with a complex.

Mostly he just felt hungry and a little gross. 

And sore. His body was nothing but a pleasant ache, each and every muscle well-used and his skin still tingling from the memory of teeth and tongue.

It was dark, the only light coming from a small candle burning in the corner.

He was in a room of black stones and old wood, protected from the cold by a blanket of warm, heavy furs.

Felix rolled over, momentarily fearful that he’d been dreaming. But reality held - he was not alone and the arm wrapped around him belonged to the man he’d never believed he could see alive again.

Felix squinted and studied Alex -  _ Dimitri.  _ For the moment at least, his heat had died down to manageable and his mind was (mostly) clear. __ Without all the furs and mask, Dimitri was less imposing but still muscular and scarred; a fighter’s body in a way he’d never imagined. Felix traced his fingers along the bare torso, his thumb ghosting over a patch of white scarring near his nipple. It was difficult to square away with his memories of Alex, reed-thin and awkward, but - 

This was better, somehow; an Alpha built of experience and constant battles and therefore all the more suited to pass on his lineage.

They were going to have such  _ perfect  _ pups.

(Maybe he wasn’t entirely free from heat brain. He’d tolerate it - for now.)

Dimitri rolled over on his back and Felix slid on top, looking down and letting his fingers roam lower to the muscles on his abdomen. Some courting ritual - really, he could have simply  _ told  _ Felix he was alive and Felix would go running. Felix would cut through entire  _ armies  _ for this chance.

(It had to be the heat brain. Felix refused to consider the alternatives.)

Was Dimitri the same as the teenager he remembered?

Was Alex an act, performed through a smiling mask while a prince made of ice burned time? Was the Winter King truly a beast baying for Imperial blood?

Did it matter?

Felix’s fingers wrapped around Dimitri’s throat, his pinky near the still-healing bite mark Felix left.  (One of them, at least.) The pulse was solid, strong,  _ alive _ . So very blessedly alive.

Dimitri's eyes fluttered open and he gazed up at Felix, utterly guileless.

Dimitri’s hands were warm as they gripped Felix’s forearms.

Felix breathed, moving back slightly. He felt the heat of Dimitri’s cock stirring to life and - 

And - 

“How are you feeling?” Dimitri pressed a kiss to Felix’s wrist. 

“Shut up.” Felix shuddered as more dampness spread between his legs. Damn his body for still - for still  _ wanting  _ more. Even with the previous night’s activities, broken up by brief attempts to clean up and drink some cold, minty liquid, it hadn’t been enough (three times! Unrelenting  _ beast _ !), he still wasn’t satisfied. Somehow,  _ somehow  _ \- he didn’t feel nearly as much pain as he should as he bore down on that impossibly large cock. “You made me  _ wait _ . For years, Dimitri.”

“My apologies.” Another kiss and - and  _ damn _ , he was nibbling at Felix’s skin. “My beautiful mate.”

The compliment made Felix moan, lifting himself up and down, finding a rhythm where Dimitri’s dick touched him in all the right places. “I’m not your blushing bride.”

“Absolutely not.” Dimitri’s hands moved upwards, teasingly brushing against Felix’s chest and he had the gall to pinch a sensitive nub.  _ Everywhere  _ was sensitive. “You’re truly beautiful.”

“Whatever sorcery you’re using it won’t -  _ fuck  _ \- it won’t work.” Felix insisted even though he was close, so very close, he just needed to - just - get filled up and then he’ll get his sword and - “I won’t lose so easily.”

“I did win, I seem to remember.” Dimitri bent upwards to kiss him as though Felix alone could provide air for his lungs. 

“Once.” Felix murmured stubbornly as he let Dimitri’s hands move to his chin. Dimitri clearly didn’t have much experience in kissing but he made up for it with eager teeth and tongue.

“Three times.” Dimitri murmured against his skin. “So far.”

“That doesn’t count.” Felix felt his skin get hotter. “ _ Be my mate. Bear my children  _ \- really?” Felix laughed, a little breathy, a little wild. “Some courtship.”

That made Dimitri pause and Felix could see a brief, awkward flush “I heard you would not even tolerate such advances without -”

Goddess. Felix was going to murder Glenn for spreading rumors.

“I didn’t say  _ that _ .” Felix tugged at Dimitri’s hair before he could get his mouth back or Felix’s neck again. “Beast.”

Dimitri’s knot expanded as he came inside Felix and it was just as intense as earlier. Felix orgasmed with a string of curses, utterly fascinated as his own seed painted Dimitri’s stomach.

He wanted it to stay there, he thought as he reached down to spread the whiteness all over Dimitri’s bare skin. He wanted Dimitri to be as utterly ruined as Felix felt.

“I suppose I should tell you what happened then.” Dimitri kissed him and patted Felix’s ass. Felix intended to swipe at his chest. His traitorous fingers decided, against all reason, to knead at the firm muscle like some overgrown cat. 

They fucked instead.

Something was off with his father’s mood. Dimitri couldn’t quite interpret it but he could sense it. Lambert paced back and forth, his eyes going to the glass windows before he turned his attention back to the letters strewn about. Dimitri did not read them - not without his father’s permission at least.

“Father, perhaps - some air?” Dimitri asked, tilting his head. Omegas were supposed to be sensitive to other’s moods, weren’t they? Perhaps he’d buck his family trend.

Lambert paused to smile at his son. “My boy, aren't you supposed to get ready for the reception? We have many lords visiting today.”

Dimitri stood up straighter and bowed his head. “Apologies.” He did need to brush his hair and switch to more formal wear - Dimitri spent the entire morning doing lancework or listening to his tutor drone through the list of visiting dignitaries. It was his stepmother’s birthday and Cornelia arranged a fete to celebrate.

“Make sure and look your best.” Lambert paused. “Dima, do you remember me mentioning Rodrigue?”

Dimitri blinked. Rodrigue - Rodrigue, not a Rowe or a Gautier, nor one of the ancient kings. Rodrigue was - “Your old friend? Fraldarius.” Yes, that was correct. “He left the kingdom years ago to claim an estate in Leicester.”

Lambert smiled with a tinge of regret. Dimitri had heard all sorts of stories about their younger days, when apparently the two were inseparable and a terror to their tutors. His father did not speak of the separation but it was clear that it pained him.

“Dima - if for whatever reason you find yourself in danger, head south.” Lambert reached down to gently squeeze Dimitri’s shoulder. “Find Rodrigue.”

Dimitri’s brows furrowed in thought. “Father?”

“Go clean up. You will be expected at four PM sharp.”

Dimitri bowed and turned to exit.

“Dima - “ Dimitri paused, waiting, “Wear your ceremonial sword.”

Fhirdiad Castle was tall and spacious, a carryover from the kingdom’s founding. Over time it added more wings and nooks and crannies, usually to serve as shelter for the people in times of deep winter. Dimitri walked along, nodding to the various staff and the occasional highborn noble that he passed. Dimitri rarely needed escorts within the confines of the castle - there had not been an attack on a royal life for many decades.

Still.

Something felt wrong. The air felt heavy, even as he heard cheerful chatter all around him. 

Dimitri looked up, mildly startled to see a young man his age hauling a huge cask. On instinct he rushed over, just as the thick container rolled forward.

Dimitri caught the edge and balanced it. The boy stared at him, surprised.

He was tall - taller than Dimitri, with dark skin and pale hair. A Duscur native, perhaps. Lambert spent a great many years building diplomatic relations and it was not uncommon to see Duscur merchants around the capital. There was still tension - more than his father let on it seemed but Dimitri was hopeful.

“You do not need to help me.” The boy said in a low, even tone.

“It’s my pleasure, honestly.” Dimitri adjusted his grip and gave a warm smile. “To the outer gardens, correct?”

The boy nodded.

“Are you a servant?”

“I beg your pardon?” Dimitri blinked.

“Your attire.”

“Oh, yes, well.” Dimitri laughed awkwardly. “It is rather absurd, isn’t it?”

“Hm.” They passed through a hallway, then another. Few people acknowledged them - so busy making the final touches. Blue fabric was everywhere, blue-painted armor and weapons glittered along the walls. 

The air outside was much nicer - cool and crisp and strong with the smell of flowers. The Duscur boy directed him towards a small corner full of wooden crates and together they set the cask near an awning where someone had hung several bright lanterns. One of the head chefs stared at Dimitri and Dimitri politely bowed.

“You are a strange person.” The Duscur boy murmured, blinking evenly.

“Am I?” Dimitri awkwardly laughed. “Perhaps Is there anything else I can assist with?”

“I need to find the main kitchen area. It is where I am to meet my associates.”

“That isn’t far.” Dimitri turned and paused, twisting back as he heard an ominous groan. “Watch out!” He jumped forward, just as the boy jumped back.

The awning snapped and collapsed, taking half the crates with it. Wine splattered everywhere and white dust burst out of a crate and several people scattered as all the hard work of the entire morning was wiped out.

Dimitri grimaced. He looked down apologetically at the boy. “Are you hurt?”

The boy blinked. “I am fine.”

“Oh. Good.” Dimitri slowly withdrew, brushing the wood off his shoulders. His legs were covered in flour and something smelly and - 

“Highness!”

Dimitri looked up as a woman in blue and white rushed over. A few more people looked his way, suddenly even more on edge.

“Highness?” The boy repealed.

“I’m quite fine.” Dimitri stood straighter and looked at the adults surrounding them. “He was just going to escort me back to my room so I could change clothes.”

Dimitri grabbed the boy’s hand and pulled him along before anything else could happen.

“You’re the prince.” the boy said, still a little startled.

Dimitri fastened the belt around his waist and carefully fixed each and every button on his deep blue shirt. He hardly looked his best but - he would do. There was no point in asking for a bath to be drawn up for him when so many people were so busy and his father likely did not need the added stress.

He could manage for a short time, surely.

“You still have not told me your name.” Dimitri chided. 

“Dedue.” The boy - Dedue - awkwardly stood at the doorway, almost as though he was terrified of coming inside. It was not that impressive of a room, really. Dimitri spent most of his time either in a small wing with a tutor or outside training with his various weapons-masters.

“I hope you will not think of me differently Dedue?” Dimitri turned and made the last adjustments to his attire. “It’s been quite some time since I could speak to someone my age.”

That was another thing he didn’t enjoy about the elder nobility. Many lords already were trying to court him with young Omegas and the promise of future mating endeavors. 

“I - “ Dedue stepped back, hesitant. “Perhaps it's best that I leave.”

Dimitri grabbed his sword and fastened it to his belt. “Then may I escort you?”

Dedue grunted. “It may not be wise to - “

“Then I will follow you.” Dimitri walked forward and out the door. He was already late for the start of the welcoming ceremony but perhaps it would be all right in the long run.

They made it to the main hallway before Dimitri stopped.

“Something is not right.” Dedue murmured very softly. “Is it always this quiet?”

Dimitri’s heart skipped in his chest as some impulse drove him to begin moving slowly - slowly towards the great hall. Perhaps festivities were moved outside? Or else - 

He heard a scream. Then another. Then the noise of weapons drawn and - 

Dimitri ran. Behind him, he could hear Dedue’s heavy footsteps as they raced along the hallway towards the reception area.

The servants were all on the ground, dark red blooming on their clothes. 

His father - 

His father was - 

Dimitri’s stomach roiled as he stepped back, horrified. That wasn’t - surely - 

“We missed one!” someone shouted and then two men in merchant garb wielding bloodied knives ran forward. Dimitri withdrew his sword and put himself in front of Dedue, his training kicking into overdrive. One of the men slashed at his arm and pain blossomed, just as Dimitri’s sword slammed through his chest. In the corner of his eye he saw Dedue yank a shield from the wall and block the blows of the other. Dimitri spun, using his height to push upwards and gut the other man.

Their opponents fell in gasping heaps, twitching as death took them.

Dimitri fell to his knees, bile rising and rising in his throat and he vomited, his head still spinning.

Goddess. 

He’d killed someone. Some _ ones _ .

There was shouting but he didn't hear it. Dedue grabbed onto his arm and he stumbled, aware of more and more voices. They had to - they had to find his father didn’t they? His father would know what to do if - 

More bodies. Aster, his math tutor, staring vacantly up at nothing. Lilian, his history tutor, her viscera in open display. Molly - the young maid that always allowed him to steal an extra tart - 

More movement. Fight. Dedue was in danger. Protect.

Blood.

Noise.

“The tunnel.” Dimitri mumbled, even as his voice, as his body felt very very far away. He recognized a tapestry at the end of the hallway - a blue lion rearing upwards, how had he gotten here again? Why was Dedue holding onto his hand?

He tugged and tugged as the tapestry yanked free and revealed old, faded stone. Dimitri pushed and pushed and  _ pushed _ and the stone crumbled against his strength. Behind it was a gaping maw of darkness and cold air.

“Do not let go of me.” Dimitri begged as Dedue’s hand tightened in his.

They descended.

Dimitri remembered the rest in bits and pieces. He remembered escaping into Fhirdiad, he remembered the chaos of the crowds as word spread of the death of the king and the royal family. He remembered how strange it was to hear about’ the dead prince,’ as though he was a ghost of his own mind.

He remembered riding on the back of wagons, of drifting through the freezing Faerghus night as soldiers in bright red roamed the roads and he felt an unfamiliar burning hatred. He remembered Dedue, ever patient and ever calm, encouraging him to eat even when all Dimitri could taste was bitterness and loss. Dedue made him promise - over and over again - that he would live, that he would keep moving and so Dimitri did, even as he still saw his father’s body in his dreams.

He remembered fear. He remembered feeling like he was drifting farther and farther away, caught in a nightmare he could not wake from.

He remembered the night Dedue disappeared, promising that he would only be gone for a few hours as he attempted to contact Duscur merchants.

He remembered watching the sun rise three mornings in a row before he stood up on exhausted limbs and moved south.

He remembered waking up in an unfamiliar chapel, wrapped in blankets and with a strange young man calling him a girl,

And for the first time in many moons, Dimitri felt like he was safe again.

“Was it all a lie?” Felix asked again, his chest still tight and a deep  _ ache  _ settling beneath his ribcage. Alex had always been a little distant but - for all of that to be hiding beneath the surface. For Felix to have never  _ cared _ when Dimitri had lost so much….

“No.” Dimitri carded his hand through Felix’s hair, “I truly was happy to be in your family’s care. But - the entire time Rodrigue was sending letters to the old nobility in Faerghus, trying to gauge how many were still loyal to the crown. When I heard that Adrestia was starting to march on Leicester, when you grew ill - I was afraid I would bring the Empire to your doorstep. Seeing Dedue return reminded me I could not avoid my responsibilities any longer..”

Felix snorted. “Responsibilities.” Felix would have kept Dimitri safe. They could have run away or - or something. Anything other than leaving Felix alone. 

“My people were suffering. Faerghus is my responsibility.”

“That’s a fool’s thinking.” Felix leaned into the touch, still slightly afraid he’d wake up. “So you pretend to be some folk hero to - what?” Goddess, he’d missed that touch. Why couldn’t they just stay in the bed - the room - for the remainder of their days? “There will always be more soldiers.”

“It’s a little more complicated than that. The Winter King is -” 

Felix’s stomach gurgled.

“Oh.” Dimitri flushed. “We probably need to eat.”

Felix made a tiny, guttural curse as Dimitri moved from the bed. He glowered at his back, only taking comfort in the many bite and scratch marks - physical reminders of Felix’s presence that could not be removed so easily.

Felix crawled out of bed, ignoring the way his muscles protested and the discomfort between his legs made itself known. His body had been through far worse than rigorous sex. Iit could surely keep itself together long enough to eat (and for another round or two).

(Heat brain. Damned heat brain.)

Dimitri tossed him some plain, clean clothes and Felix made an attempt to look presentable.

They were in an outpost of some sort. It was made from the same black stones as most of Faerghus and, at least from the inside, looked in a terrible state of disrepair. A few candles flickered with light but the entire thing was terribly pathetic.

“This is just one of many bases of course. I rarely stay in one place. The Empire is stretched thin so they don’t send scouts to assess the outposts in a state of ruin.” Dimitri led him through a winding hallway towards a small, semi-open space where a few strangers were sitting around eating from a bubbling pot of soup and vegetables. One of them was tall and Felix immediately recognized the white hair and dark skin. Another was small with grey hair that Felix recognized as one of the chefs from the party. The third was tall with bright red hair and - 

Behind them were two very familiar people.

Felix twitched. Dimitri’s hand tightened in his.

“Hey Your Highness.” The redhead waved awkwardly from his spot. “We uh, apparently have guests.”

Ingrid and Leonie glowered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M ALIVE

**Author's Note:**

> Happy Dimilix Week Y'all no this is not meant to be serious yes I am juggling 3 WIPs also lovely weather we're having


End file.
